


The Master of Charlton Park

by Gerec



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)
Genre: Alpha!Erik, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Regency, Angst, F/M, Forbidden Love, M/M, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Omega!Charles, Pregnancy, Regency Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 13:13:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14165595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gerec/pseuds/Gerec
Summary: On the brink of losing his ancestral home, omega Charles Xavier agreed to do the unthinkable; he would sacrifice his own happiness for the sake of his family, and bear a child for a married alpha and his mate.But Charles never expected that alpha to be Erik Lehnsherr, with whom he shared an impossible love and undeniable passion.





	1. Such Happiness is Fleeting

**Author's Note:**

> Chinese Translation available [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17776973).

The first time Charles met Erik Lehnsherr was at a spring ball hosted by the MacTaggerts, where the new Earl of Suffolk had been the guest of honor. He had been polite if a little aloof with the others, though with Charles he had been nothing but kind and attentive. They spoke long into the night on various subjects of interest, and Charles had left the party in the highest of spirits, with the hope that the Earl would come calling as promised.

But Erik did not come to Xavier Manor, nor did he send any word or reason; he simply retreated to his estate of Charlton Park after that night and withdrew from all manner of societal obligations. Charles, being an omega and from a family of lower standing, could hardly reach out to the Earl for an explanation, no matter how things had seemed—

No matter that Erik had kissed him until he was breathless and Charles had allowed it, the intensity of the Earl’s focus having swept away all reservations and any sense of propriety.

Even in the weeks and months after, when it became increasingly clear that Charles’ affections had not in fact been returned, he could not find it in his heart to regret meeting Erik, or the powerful - albeit brief - connection they had shared.

As summer turned to fall, Charles resigned himself to his stepfather’s match making, for their livelihood was at risk due to years of poor management and debt. It was Charles’ place as both omega and heir to secure an alpha spouse of means, so that his family would not be evicted from their ancestral home. There had been more than a few who came calling, though all were rejected by Kurt for not being sufficiently wealthy to provide for the entire Xavier household.

It was in their most desperate hour that Erik Lehnsherr returned to the scene.

Charles did not know – not until he saw Erik again in his parlour, taking tea with Kurt and his mother – that a deal had been struck between his stepfather and the Earl. That in exchange for his patronage, Charles would join the Earl’s household – though not as his spouse as he’d hoped, for it turned out that Erik was already married.

No, Erik was married to a beta with her own rank of Countess, and they desired the services of an omega to bear their offspring.

And with a sister, mother and a house full of servants who depended on him, Charles had no choice but to swallow his pride and bury his humiliation, and agree to a life not of his own choosing.

* * *

A week later he was in a carriage to Charlton Park, having shared a tearful goodbye with Raven and a more subdued farewell with the rest of the household. He rode beside Erik in silence and kept his eyes straight ahead, for he did not think he could bear to see the scorn – or worse, pity – on the man’s face. In truth, Charles hoped that Erik would provide some measure of assurances, both for his actions and for his new role, but the Earl simply sat and brooded, and did not seem happy at all to be in his presence.

When they finally arrived at their destination it was to see Erik’s staff waiting as they pulled to a stop, and Erik veritably scrambled out of the carriage, leaving Charles to the tender mercy of strangers. He was guided into the vestibule by the steward Azazel – a sharply dressed gentlemen with impeccable manners – and introduced to key members of the household before being whisked away to his bedroom.

He met the Countess not long afterwards.

The Frosts had a lineage as old as the Xaviers, though they had done a much better job keeping their fortune intact. The Countess herself was beautiful if slightly remote, though at least she did not seem to resent Charles’ arrival. In fact, he noted almost relief coming from Emma as she welcomed him, and she attempted at least to explain a little of why Charles suddenly found himself in such a predicament.

“I have never desired to bear children,” Emma said, as they sat and drank tea together in her private parlour, “nor to have relations with any alpha, omega or beta. So it would have been nigh on impossible for Erik and I to produce heirs to carry on the Lehnsherr name. Your presence here will alleviate both pressure and expectation from me, and our marriage can only benefit from it. You will be treated with respect by myself and the members of our household, and you are not required to perform any duties except that which you have already been given.”

It made Charles uncomfortable to speak of sex with the woman’s husband, though she did not seem at all affected by her own words. She promised to send a servant to see to Charles’ needs, wished him well and bid him good luck, and then left him alone once more in unfamiliar surroundings, contemplating the why and how of his new life.

Dinner was brought to him after he had a chance to freshen up, by a young man named Sean who was to be his personal valet. He would be joining the Lehnsherrs for meals going forward, it was explained, though the Countess thought to give Charles some time alone today to acclimate. It was a courtesy unexpected though much appreciated, for Charles could hardly stomach seeing Erik again, knowing how the Earl truly saw him, as one suitable only for pleasure and to impregnate with his seed.

By the time night fell, Charles still had not seen or heard from Erik, and so he changed into his bed shift and readied himself for sleep. It was still warm enough that he did not need more than one layer of clothing, and so he climbed into the large four poster bed and settled quickly underneath the thick and comfortable blankets.

He awoke some time later to the feel of a body pressing down on top of him, and almost hollered aloud if not for the fact that he recognized the voice calling his name. The smell of spirits permeated Erik’s breath, and his movements were noticeably slow and clumsy. It was not at all what Charles expected from the man who had once shown him such regard and keen interest, this awkward groping and slurred apologies as Erik shed his clothes and slipped beside him on the bed. And yet he could not deny that he yearned still for Erik’s touch; for Erik to kiss him as softly and tenderly as he did all those months ago under the moonlight.

Instead, Erik’s hands were rough and his lips impatient, as he took Charles’ mouth with his own and sought to devour him. His shift was rucked up over his belly and under his armpits, and he arched against the heat as Erik all but enveloped him. Charles moaned when deft fingers wrapped around his shaft and stroked him, the pleasure coursing through his body like liquid lightning; and he whined pitifully when the same fingers breached him, gushing slick as they worked him open for the taking.

Erik was still kissing him when he finally pushed in, smothering the startled cry that fell from Charles’ lips. He had not known what to expect for he had never been mated - or even experienced another’s touch before now - and the intensity of the sensations jarred and overwhelmed him. It was both strange and exhilarating to feel Erik moving inside of him, to feel the weight and girth of his cock driving in and filling him as he gasped and panted.

“Charles,” Erik whispered, over and over as though the words were the only thing keeping him from fleeing. “Charles, I can’t believe you’re…you’re so beautiful. I’m so sorry…Charles, please. I need this…Charles…”

He came abruptly when Erik’s knot swelled and locked into place, groaning even as Erik grunted and spurted his seed, filling Charles’ insides to overflowing. Erik then promptly slumped on top of him with a satisfied sigh, and kissed him again before he fell fast asleep. It was up to Charles to situate them more comfortably on their sides, as they would be tied together for as long as it took for Erik’s knot to subside.

As passion faded, embarrassment remained, and Charles could barely contain the disappointment and sorrow that consumed him. It was now abundantly clear that Erik had never truly cared for him, at least not for anything other than to sate his carnal appetite. But even that revelation did nothing to diminish what Charles felt in his heart of hearts, and he could only curse his own stupidity for falling for a man forever beyond his reach.

He fell asleep in Erik’s arms, with Erik’s knot inside of him still, and resigned himself to expect no more than what he’d already been given.

* * *

When he woke the next morning the bed beside him was empty, though his shift had at least been pulled down and the blankets tucked carefully around his body. He had hoped that Erik would stay and spend the night with him, and perhaps they could wake together and somehow come to a better understanding. Instead, it was yet another blow to Charles’ already fragile dream; that they might build at least a quiet friendship from this inglorious beginning.

He was sore all over from the previous night’s activities, as Erik had not had the wherewithal to be gentle, and Charles grimaced as the seed poured out of him when he shifted. It was a little mortifying, to know that he could not hide the evidence of time spent with Erik from the servants, and they would be ever reminded of exactly why their Master had brought him here.

With time before breakfast Charles sat down and wrote a letter to his sister, praising the Lehnsherrs for their kind treatment and assuring Raven of his contentment. He had confided his feelings for the Earl to her soon after the ball, and so could not hide his disappointment from her as the months wore on. Charles knew that Raven would be anxious for his wellbeing at Charlton Park, and sought to ease her mind with a few carefully chosen, if not completely honest words.

He wished he could set his own mind at ease thusly, with naught but a well-placed lie.

Too soon, Sean came to usher him to breakfast with the Lehnsherrs, who were already seated in the dining room. The Earl and the Countess were seated on opposite ends of the huge oak table, with Charles’ own place set at equal distance between them.

“Good morning, Charles! How did you sleep?”

The tension in the room was thick and only got thicker as he entered, though the smile the Countess directed his way was warm and genuine. Erik on the other hand did not even look up or acknowledge his arrival; he sat with a hand propped against his forehead as he drank his tea, no doubt nursing a headache from the alcohol he’d consumed the night before. 

He answered the Countess in the affirmative, though it was likely that she guessed the true nature of his evening, given his growing discomfort and the thunderous frown on Erik’s face. It was unbearable to be so close and yet so distant from the man he desired, and he almost excused himself after a few perfunctory bites of his meal. But Emma deftly drew him into a conversation about his knowledge and interests, and Charles found himself slowly relaxing in her witty and charming company.

“Erik,” the Countess said, as they were finishing their breakfast. The tone was pointed, and yet filled with encouragement and understanding. “Perhaps you could give Charles a tour of the estate, and show him the grounds.”

The Earl hesitated, and finally looked in Charles’ direction. He had the expression of someone who wanted to flee the premises, which only made his treacherous heart ache. “I’m…perhaps later. I have things to discuss with Azazel this morning.”

“You do not, for I have already cleared your schedule for the rest of the day. Azazel and I can go over the household budget together. You will spend some time with Charles, and make him welcome in his new home.”

She left the room then with a whirl of lace and perfume but not before passing by and laying a reassuring hand upon Charles’ shoulder. It helped to ease some, if not all of the anxiety he felt at being alone with Erik, who seemed incapable of even simple conversation with the omega who would bear his children.

But then Erik stood and came around to where Charles sat, waiting patiently as he wiped his hands clean with his napkin. He leaned in a little and took a deep breath as Charles stood - though he kept his distance and did not touch – and let out a soft sigh that sent a shiver of want down Charles’ spine.

“Shall we?” Erik asked, and Charles could only look into those steely blue eyes and nod in agreement.

He followed as Erik led them out through the patio doors, and the two of them began a leisurely walk around the extensive grounds. Charles longed for a return to their once easy comradery, when their first meeting had felt akin to a reunion between old friends. That instant connection had been one of the things he’d cherished most, for Charles had never felt as close with anyone as he had with Erik that fateful night.

Putting aside his own unease, he attempted to engage the man in conversation, asking occasional questions about the history of the mansion and the picturesque park land. And though Erik still seemed uncomfortable in Charles’ presence, he did gradually relax enough to answer him, the air of tension slowly dissipating the further they got from the mansion.

Their return hours later coincided with the time for luncheon, and so they shared a second meal together in the dining room, this time without the lady of the house. Charles sat much closer to Erik at his behest and made meaningless small talk, trying hard not to let his thoughts stray to the events of the past evening. It did not help that Erik’s focus returned three fold after their walk, and he stared constantly at Charles’ mouth with a hunger that made his insides quake. He was mortified to feel the slick gathering in his small clothes, and wondered how his body could respond so viscerally to the alpha after only one hurried coupling.

“Come, Charles. Let me show you the library.”

The words lit an entirely different fire within him, for Charles had a great love of books that far outstripped his family’s humble collection. The Earl’s library though was revelation, and Charles found himself instantly enamored with every aspect of it – from the smell of old books that covered the shelves, to the many detailed maps that littered the ornate writing table.

He was particularly entranced by the twin globes that held pride of place there, one terrestrial and one celestial and each on a beautifully carved wooden stand.

So intent was he on the paper treasures that he missed Erik moving silently towards him, and did not notice until they stood mere inches apart. A shock rippled through Charles when Erik reached out and gently covered his hand, making him jerk back in surprise and drop the book he’d been pulling from the shelf.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Erik said, withdrawing his hand and bending to pick up the fallen book off the floor. He looked most unhappy when Charles took it gingerly from his grasp, and turned and walked briskly to the other side of the room.

He shook his head and grimaced. “You must think me a manner less brute, Charles, but truly I’m sorry, _so_ sorry for what happened between us last night. I took liberties upon your person that you did not explicitly grant and now you…I did not mean to make you fear me.”

“I’m not afraid of you,” Charles argued, though it did little to erase the misery from Erik’s handsome face. “But I _am_ angry, and truthfully, rather embarrassed over this whole arrangement you made with Kurt. I thought…well I had hoped that you held me in higher regard, for you never once told me you were married, not when we danced, nor when you kissed me--”

“I know, and you have every right to be angry. But I promise you I meant no disrespect! I just…didn’t have the words to explain myself that night. And afterwards, I was too ashamed of my behavior to seek you out.”

His temper flaring, Charles could hide his anguish no longer. “Then tell me why? Why did you lie to me, and make me think we could have a future together? Why would you plot with my stepfather to buy my womb, to bear you children I will never be able to claim? Do you truly think so little of my worth that you would use me thusly, and have no care for how I feel or my love for you—”

Erik gasped as the words tumbled unbidden from Charles’ mouth, and then shouted in surprise when Charles promptly turned and fled, too mortified to stop until he’d made it all the way back to his room and locked the door behind him.

His hands were shaking as he sat down on the bed, berating himself for losing his temper and baring his innermost secret to the very person he never wanted to know. It pained him physically to realize that his feelings were indeed one-sided, and had been from the start, and he vowed to steel his heart against the Earl from this moment forward, no matter what falsities the man claimed for his callous behavior.

“Charles?  Charles, please open the door.”

He ignored it, taking deep breaths to regain some measure of control but then the soft knocking turned into loud pounding that echoed like thunder down the hall.

“Charles! Please, you must let me explain; I need to tell you--”

The words abruptly cut off when Charles flung open the door, and he pulled Erik into the room before closing it quickly behind him. It stunned Erik enough that he could only stand and gape for long moments, and Charles took the opportunity to speak his mind, and to lay the course for their interactions going forward.

“Charles—“

“No, please, I don’t wish to hear your apologies or your excuses. Truthfully, you made me no promises that night; only that you might see me again some other day. It was I who inferred more from our interaction, and foolishly thought you felt something for me than simple lust. But you have no need to worry for I am well aware of my purpose here. I expect nothing but common courtesy from you, Earl Lehnsherr, and I shall do my duty as my stepfather promised. I will bear you and the Countess an heir and then be on my way.”

It hurt him to speak so baldly of his pain but Charles wanted Erik gone from his sight. He needed time alone to wallow in self-pity, and to armor his heart for the agonizing weeks and months to follow.

But Erik only looked at him with sad eyes brimming with unshed tears, before he dropped to his knees and folded his arms around an astonished Charles.

“I love you,” Erik confessed, his words muffled against the fabric of Charles’ waistcoat. “I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you on the dance floor, that night at the MacTaggerts’ ball. I knew that I shouldn’t have…I should have left you alone and never approached you but my heart would not listen, Charles! I’ve loved you through every second and every kiss we’ve shared together, and I cannot tell you how it pains me to know that I have hurt you so grievously…”

Charles shook his head and whispered, “Lies. You were married, before you ever knew me. You say you love me, and yet your heart was never free.”

“I am married yes, but Emma and I are not in love. She and I have been friends from childhood but that’s all it’s ever been between us. We’ve never even shared the same bed.”

Charles shook his head again, and tried unsuccessfully to pry himself from Erik’s iron grip. “Why are you telling me this? What does it matter, if you truly don’t love your own wife? It doesn’t change the fact that you’re still _married_ , and that I can never have any real place in your life.”

And this finally made Erik stop clutching at him and let go, for he could hardly deny the veracity of Charles’ statement. He watched as Erik picked himself off the ground with a weary sigh, and settle despondently into the armchair by the bed.

“Emma never wanted to marry, and she’s never had the desire to bond or to bear any children, much to her father’s dismay. And I…I lost the omega I would marry to illness long ago, and had no intentions of finding any other. We thought it best if the two of us wed, to satisfy my uncle’s demands and her father’s wishes. It was always our plan to find a surrogate to carry a child for us…”

Charles’ temper flared again and he snapped, “So you saw me and decided what? That I would make the perfect candidate for broodmare? You were attracted enough to my looks that it would not be a chore to bed me? How _dare_ you—”

“No!” Erik leaped to his feet and reached out to him, only for Charles to retreat to the other side of the room. “I met you and I fell in love and it was the last thing I ever expected. I know it was wrong to give you false hope, but I wanted so to hold you in my arms and kiss you, even if I knew in my heart I could never see you again.”

“Then how am I here?” Charles demanded. “If you love me why reduce me to…this? Not spouse, and not even a lover; an employee to fulfill a contract, or some common who—“

“No, please! Charles, please! That’s not…” Erik tried, his fists clenching and unclenching as he pleaded for understanding. “I knew it was unfair of me, to let you think I could offer marriage. I was intent on leaving you alone, so you might fall in love with another who could give you what you deserved. But then it became known to me that your stepfather had turned away numerous suitors, and was even offering you up as a surrogate—“

Charles snorted. “How serendipitous, that you could have me after all.”

Erik frowned, his frustration clear though he bore Charles’ accusations without complaint. “No. Even then I was only upset for you, for you deserved to be loved, by one who could offer you the world. But we discovered that Marko was in final negotiations with Colonel Stryker for you to join their household and Emma convinced me to intercept and make a counter-offer.”

He had not known about Stryker, or that Kurt had bartered Charles’ virginity and his womb with more than one alpha. The shame rose again like bile in Charles’ throat, and he turned away so Erik could not see his face. “So I should thank you then. At least I am here, at Charlton Park with an alpha who professes to love me.”

“Charles,” Erik said, as he bridged the distance between them with great care. He drew Charles into his arms and held him close, and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. “You don’t have to stay here. I will release you from this arrangement, if that is your wish.”

“My family—”

“Has already been cleared of their debts, and it will remain so no matter what you decide. I know, I  _know_  that I’ve been selfish, Charles, and that my behavior has been deplorable. But I do love you, truly with all my heart and I would not hold you here against your will. It’s your choice to stay or go.”

It was all too much information for Charles to process at once, and in the end he asked Erik to leave without giving an answer. There were so many revelations to digest and so many factors to consider, not the least of which was his own conflicted feelings for Erik Lehnsherr.

He requested dinner in his room again, some hours later, unable to stomach the thought of taking a meal together with the Earl and his wife. Charles’ pride was too raw and wounded still, and even Erik’s ardent declarations of love could not take away the hurts inflicted by his actions. It might be best to take the offer and return home to Xavier Manor, he thought, until he remembered the weight of his sister’s pity and his stepfather’s machinations…

There was simply nowhere Charles could go and still preserve what little was left of his dignity.

It was a surprise when the Countess asked to see him after the dinner hour, and Charles was tempted to decline by feigning ill health. But Emma Frost had shown him courtesy unexpected, and so he would endeavor – albeit with some misgiving – to return the favor.

She did not ask him any questions outright or demand any answers, something Charles was grateful for, given her own personal investment. And she made no pretense of justifying Erik’s behavior or plying Charles with pretty words; no, Emma simply looked upon him and took his measure, and offered him the truths that she thought he deserved.

“Erik is my best and closest friend, Charles, and I love him and care for him, even if it’s not as a wife should for her husband. I have also known him most of my life, and he has never felt for another what he feels for you.”

Charles sighed, but only regarded her in silence.

“I know that you love him too, for it has been written all over your face from the moment you stepped through our front door,” Emma continued. “Nothing would make him happier than to have a child with you. I’m asking you to reconsider your decision, and stay.”

He shook his head and laughed bitterly at her words. “You want me to stay and bear you and Erik a child. A child I would have to give up and never see again. Why? Why would I do this when he has given me leave to return home?”

“Because a part of you wants to do this for Erik,” she replied, “and for you. He is married, Charles, and this is the only way the two of you can be together. You will have happiness here, at least for a while, and the opportunity to create a life that is of both your flesh and blood. A gift for the man you love, and a way for him to hold on to a piece of you forever.”

Charles could not help it; he looked upon the Countess and scoffed, “How very poetic. Are you truly so desperate for an heir that you would try to sway me with a fairy tale?”

Her gaze sharpened, but then Emma only sighed when she answered, “I am not the one in desperate need of an heir.”

“I don’t understand—”

“Erik’s inheritance comes from his uncle, who stipulated in his will that Erik must have an heir by the time he turns thirty. He is only months away from his thirtieth birthday, Charles, and if he cannot meet the will’s requirements he will lose Charlton Park and everything that belongs to him.”

“There’s still time, isn’t there? To find another omega?”

Emma shook her head. “I know Erik, better than he knows himself sometimes. He will never take any other, Charles, now that he’s fallen in love with you.”

His heart sank, and though he knew that Emma meant to influence him he couldn’t help but be moved by Erik’s plight. “He didn’t tell me.”

“He wouldn’t have,” she agreed. “He‘s been berating himself for hurting you, and for handling things so poorly. He doesn’t want to burden you with his problems, since he’s been the cause of so much of your pain. But, Charles, I have no such reservation, for though I am genuinely fond of you, I would do all that I can to help him. Especially as he refuses to help himself.”

Emma’s words rang in his ears long into the night, after Charles retired to his room and turned in for bed. He tossed and turned and his heart would not stop racing, for he could not deny the difficult truth; that he was irrevocably in love with Erik Lehnsherr, and he longed desperately to be with him.

He thought of Erik’s smile, and his kisses, and the way it felt to be touched; how the core of him ached to be penetrated and his body worshipped by the man he so loved. It would not be forever no – Charles knew now he could never have what he truly wanted, but could he say no to a chance at true happiness? Fleeting though it might be?

Returning home now, he knew, would give Kurt a chance to force another match, to marry him to another alpha or even to sell his womb again to the highest bidder. He was too aware of his stepfather’s greed to trust that he had Charles’ best intentions, and it was only too likely that he’d find his way back to Colonel Stryker’s household before the end of the year.

Given the choice, he would rather bear Erik’s child, and know that some part of Charles at least would remain always at his side.

He crept out of bed and slipped on his dressing gown, and made his way quietly along the darkened halls to Erik’s room. To Charles’ relief, the door was unlocked and he stepped inside and quickly shut it behind him.

“Charles?”

Erik was staring at him from the bed, sleep tousled and so beautiful under the moonlight. He stepped closer and watched as Erik’s eyes roved over his body, longing and desperation writ clearly across his face.

“I love you,” Charles said, “and though I know we cannot have forever, it’s enough that I can be with you at all. I would stay and have you love me, and bear a child of our blood. Do you want that too, Erik?”

“I never thought—“ Erik began, and then he huffed a shuddering breath and scrambled out of the bed. He wrapped his arms around Charles and kissed him, relieved and full of wonder as he said, “I would take any moment you deemed to give me, Charles. Even if it was but a second more to look upon your face. I love you, and only you. Now and forever, no matter what the future brings.”

Charles smiled, and leaned into Erik’s warm embrace. “Then show me how you love me, Earl Lehnsherr, and take me to bed.”

 


	2. Glad Tidings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles' and Erik's reconciliation bears fruit. And Charles makes a decision about his future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So 2 chapters have somehow turned into 4 (that's the plan anyway) with the next one switching back to Charles' POV. Also, let's enjoy the fluffy goodness while we can!!! :D :D :D

Erik thought his heart might burst from happiness as he looked upon Charles’ face, staring at him with such adoration and love as to take his breath away. He could scarcely believe it, even with Charles in his arms; that his innumerable trespasses would be forgiven, and he would choose to stay at Erik’s side.

“Then show me how you love me, Earl Lehnsherr, and take me to bed.”

The words lit a fire in his loins, and Erik could naught but kiss him again, moaning greedily as Charles all but melted against him.  The guilt sat heavy in his gut for the manner in which he’d behaved, drunk and callous in his fumbling the night before, and he was determined to set things right. He would make love to Charles and worship every inch of his body, and bring him both passion and pleasure unending.

“May I,” he asked, and Charles nodded, a little breathless as Erik gently peeled the dressing gown off his shoulders. The shift quickly followed, and then Charles was standing nude in front of Erik, skin soft and glowing and utterly ethereal.

He shed his own clothes quickly, and then drew his lover onto the bed, laying him on the covers and spread out like a feast before him. Charles did not quail under his devouring eye, though he did gasp at every touch; Erik could not think of anything more angelic yet delightfully sinful, as the way Charles arched and quivered beneath him.

They made love, slow and careful, and Erik took his time to explore, reveling in the noises he pulled from Charles with every teasing swipe of his tongue. He took Charles in his mouth and sucked him gently, and slid long fingers inside his body, marveling at the tightness that greeted him. It was wet with slick already, warm and welcoming, and it was Erik’s turn to shiver, the anticipation setting him aflame.

It was akin to heaven, with Charles opening like a flower in bloom as he slid in with a muffled groan. His lover writhed and gasped and clenched tight with unbridled pleasure, and clutched at Erik’s back as though he were drowning. It took every ounce of control he had to stay still inside that velvet heat, basking in exquisite torture until Charles relaxed and bade him move with an almost desperate pleading.

“Erik, my Erik,” Charles breathed, and Erik kissed his name from those perfect lips, driving his hips to the rhythm of his lover’s moans. Every hard stroke sent molten lightning through Erik’s veins and every slow drag made Charles keen and tremble, toes curling as he spread his legs with a wanton growl.

He came with Erik’s knot inside of him, buried deep, crying out as Erik pulsed hot and sticky and filled him to the brim. It seemed to go on forever, or for mere moments as he emptied his seed, and then he all but crumbled on top of Charles with a sigh, and pressed a tender kiss upon his cheek.

“I love you,” he whispered, as Charles held him close and brushed the matted hair from his forehead. “I could never begin to express how deeply I feel for you, Charles, if I had from now until the end of days. My heart is yours, for now and always.”

“Now and always,” Charles repeated, smile soft as he kissed him. “My heart is yours.”

* * *

The days that followed were the happiest of Erik’s life, and he spent every moment he could spare at his beloved’s side. They went riding often, and Erik found that his lover was an accomplished equestrian, who often beat him in their impromptu races around Charlton Park and beyond. They took long walks too around the estate and shared stories of their childhoods, learning much about their respective families and their various hopes and dreams. Charles told of a loving father who died too young and a widowed mother who was forced to re-marry, and about a budding interest in the sciences that was quickly deemed inappropriate by his new stepfather. It was Charles’ dream too to see all the lands of the British Empire, he’d said, so he could sate the wandering spirit that yet lived within him.

In turn Erik told him about his own family; parents who died and left him beholden to a strict uncle with impossible standards and expectations. It was a relationship filled with disappointment and strife on both sides, resulting in long years where the two barely saw or even spoke to each other. And even in death the man endeavored to control every aspect of Erik’s life, setting conditions of both marriage and an heir to the inheritance he would bequeath to this only nephew.

For the most part, Emma left them to their own devices, though they did join her each day and share the evening meal together in the dining room. It was clear to Erik that she had grown quite fond of Charles, a feeling that was readily shared in turn by his kind and ever affable lover. It was a joy that Erik had never hoped to feel in this lifetime; to fall hopelessly in love, and to share in it with his oldest and dearest friend.

But Emma was pragmatic where Erik was impulsive, and soon enough he drew criticism from her that was both apt and upsetting.

“You are being too careless, Erik,” she chided, as he played a composition from Mozart for her on the grand piano. Charles had turned in early for bed that evening, citing fatigue, though not before he insisted that Erik stay and keep Emma company in the parlour. “You’re being too overtly affectionate with Charles in front of the household, as one would only behave with their spouse.”   

Erik snorted, and continued to play. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous, Emma, because that would be ridiculous. And I know you better than to think you actually care what the servants are whispering.”

“Of course not,” Emma sighed with frustration, “but it is not me or my reputation that concerns me, or yours. It’s Charles I worry about, and what your blatant affair will do to his reputation, and his chances to marry someone suitable after he leaves this house.”

His fingers stilled and he turned to Emma with a frown. “Why are we talking about Charles getting married? He’s not even pregnant yet! And what if I told you that I wanted him to stay? Raise the child with us, and give us many more children to love in the future? Surely that would be agreeable to us all?”

It was asking a lot from Charles, he knew, to live with them with no status or title, but Erik was sure that his lover would be amiable if asked. He had faith in Charles’ total affection, for it was equal in measure to the magnitude of Erik’s own all-encompassing love.

Emma rose from the sedan and made her way to Erik’s side, resting a gloved hand on his shoulder, massaging the tension away with a soft exhale. “Yes, he would stay, for love of you and the child to his own detriment. Do you really think it would be fair, Erik? For him to remain in our household forever, bearer but not spouse or parent? Doesn’t he deserve to have a family of his own? A spouse who loves him—“

“ _I_ love him,” Erik snapped, though he softened immediately, and reached to kiss Emma’s hand. “I love him, Em, and I can’t bear the thought of losing him. Of Charles being with any other…”

“Oh Erik,” she sighed, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and gently cradling his head. “His reputation, and that of the Xaviers would be ruined forever. Yes, Kurt’s agreement with us has damaged it some, but your title and mine offers an air of respectability at least to the entire affair; that we chose him specifically for his noble lineage. But if he stays and bears another, then that is all he will ever _be_ \- an omega bearer deemed unfit for marriage, forever ostracized by his peers. He and his House, his young sister…they’ll lose the last fragile bit of standing the Xaviers still hold in these parts. How could we be happy, knowing we brought his family name to ruin?”

It stung him to hear it, but in his heart of hearts he knew Emma’s words were true. Yes, Charles would stay and bear them children, and happily endure all manner of malicious gossip for the rest of his days. And he would be shunned where before he would have been welcomed, by those who cared only for propriety and decorum.

His own selfishness would doom Charles to live a life in the shadows, invisible and yet still subject to ridicule by his fair-weather friends. Erik’s devotion would not be a gift but a curse, he realized, one that spelled a life-time of humiliation and heartbreak for a man who deserved the world on a silver platter.

When he returned to Charles’ room, he found his lover sleeping soundly under the sheets, though he’d left space for Erik to crawl in beside him on the bed. It was tempting to rouse him, sweep Charles into his arms and make love to him, though he knew it would not stop the sorrow that had already taken root within his chest. Instead he pulled Charles close and folded him in his arms, filing the soft breaths and the scent of his skin into memory for safe keeping.

He did not fall asleep until the sun rose over the horizon.

When Erik woke the space beside him was empty, and the sounds of someone retching dragged him instantly to full awareness. He found Charles bent over the chamber pot next to the bed, trying to be quiet as he vomited, and Erik immediately sprang to his feet.

“Charles! Are you alright?”

His lover groaned in response, and Erik ran to the door and wrenched it open, hollering for assistance. Sean arrived within moments of his call and they waited – fretfully on Erik’s part – for Charles to finish before situating him carefully back into bed.

“Have the kitchen send something up to settle his stomach,” Erik instructed, “and have someone fetch Dr. McCoy.”

“Erik please, I’m fine, there’s no need for a doctor,” Charles said, though his face was still pale and wan. He seemed embarrassed at the fuss being made on his behalf, as though the attention and care paid to him was unwarranted. Erik sought to disabuse him of the notion at once.

“Indulge me,” he replied, pressing a kiss to Charles’ forehead as Sean disappeared to follow his instructions. “I would have the good doctor check on you to set my own mind at ease, to know that you aren’t suffering any illness that puts your wellbeing at risk. You are precious to me, Charles…let me take care of you as best I can.”

That at least was sufficient to stem his objections, and they settled in to wait for the doctor’s arrival. Sean returned with water and a light broth for Charles, and food for Erik’s own breakfast. They played a game of chess and discussed the merit of Wordsworth versus Keats, and bid Emma good morning when she stopped by to look in on Charles’ condition.

“I think Dr. McCoy will have good news to share with us,” Emma said, rolling her eyes when he and Charles both turned to her in puzzlement. “Oh don’t tell me you haven’t guessed! The nausea is a common symptom of pregnancy my dears, and I believe that to be the likeliest source of Charles’ sickness.”

Erik didn’t know why it surprised him so - the idea that Charles might already be pregnant - but it rocked him to the core. It both thrilled and devastated in turn, this much expected outcome, for the child meant such contradictory things to Erik and Charles; proof of their love and a bond everlasting, coupled with a hastening of Charles’ inevitable departure.

They spoke no more of it, until Dr. McCoy finally arrived in a flurry of nerves and excitement, and Emma and Erik left the room so he could examine Charles in private. They retreated to the parlour and waited, tea cooling and left untouched, sitting side by side in amicable silence as Emma gently held his hand.

“How is he, doctor?” Emma asked, when McCoy reappeared some time later, looking reassuringly calm and pleased with his visit. “Do you have news?”

“Congratulations are in order Earl Lehnsherr to you and your wife; Mr. Xavier is indeed with child, and nausea withstanding – in very excellent health.”

“Are you sure?” Erik demanded, with such vehemence that the doctor cast Emma a worrying glance. “Charles is truly pregnant? And not sick with any illness?”

“Of course I’m sure,” McCoy replied carefully, clearly discomfited by Erik’s outburst. “He’s perfectly fine. Is there…something the matter Earl Lehnsherr? Are you not pleased by the glad tidings?”

He fought back the urge to grimace, for it was not his intention to alarm the doctor, or worse – to make him question the care and comfort the Lehnsherrs were providing to their omega surrogate. It was just so difficult to contain his emotions where Charles was concerned, and his inner turmoil turned too often to outward frustration.

But as always, Emma stepped in to smooth the feathers that Erik ruffled, and she guided McCoy onto the sofa with charm and grace.

“Of course it is, Doctor! We are both delighted by the news! You must understand that Erik is very protective of Mr. Xavier, since he has so kindly left the care of his family to bless our own. I hope you’ll indulge the many questions we’ll have for you in the days to come….we want nothing but the smoothest of pregnancies for our friend.”

McCoy smiled and his shoulders sagged with relief, taking the tea offered by the maid with a courteous nod of his head. “Yes, of course, I understand completely. Please be assured that Mr. Xavier is quite well, and I’ll check on him regularly to ascertain his progress. I will also leave further instructions for your staff, regarding diet and exercise to benefit both parent and baby-to-be.”

Erik nodded and added gruffly, “Your assistance is greatly appreciated, Dr. McCoy. Whatever Charles needs, please let us know. We’ll spare no expense to see to his– I mean, the _child’s_ good health.”

McCoy didn’t notice Erik fumbling his words, but Emma was quick to shoot him a warning glare. The doctor’s censure would be far worse than the staff’s idle gossip, for McCoy could not be counted on to keep their true relationship secret. Sex between sire and bearer was strictly for procreation; anything more was deemed scandalous and so was roundly condemned.

They spoke further on ways to help with Charles’ nausea, and the doctor provided his best estimate for the birth – most likely next June, as it was currently early December – but Erik had long stopped listening to McCoy’s incessant chatter. It was not that he disliked the young doctor or doubted his skill, but Erik was most keen to return to his lover’s side. He longed to hold Charles in his arms and kiss him, knowing that a new life of their making resided already in his womb.

Perhaps Emma took pity on him, for she took McCoy by the arm and said, “Come Doctor. Let us speak with Mrs. Pryde, our housekeeper. You may leave your detailed instructions in her capable hands and she’ll make sure that the staff follows them to your specifications.”

They stood, and Erik shook McCoy’s proffered hand again, before Emma steered the good doctor through the parlour door. Erik sighed and promptly followed, heading in the other direction up the stairs and towards Charles’ bedroom.

He knocked, and could barely wait for an answer before he stumbled in and fell on the bed, drawing Charles into his arms in the tightest embrace.

“A baby,” he whispered, and he heard Charles laugh, as joyful and disbelieving as Erik felt. Pulling back, he peppered Charles’ face with a dozen kisses, stopping only when he was yanked down beside his lover onto the bed.

“A baby,” Charles agreed, and Erik could scarcely contain his joy at the quiet wonder in his words. He reached around and laid a hand against the warmth of bare skin, and imagined the swelling curve of his lover’s belly as the baby grew in the months to follow.

“I have never been so happy in all my life,” he said, nuzzling Charles’ neck with a contented sigh. “I did not think it possible for me to have this…you, and the baby, to love with my whole heart.”

“Nor did I,” Charles agreed, “know how blessed I would feel until this very moment, knowing you love me, and our baby as much as I love you both in return. I would do anything, Erik, to have this moment last forever. _Give_ anything, just to stay here in your arms.”

And that was when he knew beyond a shadow of doubt - what Charles would do if only Erik would ask it of him. For love, Charles would stay gladly and live with him in shame, and let the Xavier name and legacy fall utterly to ruin…

Erik clutched him and kissed him tenderly and said nothing in return.

* * *

The next few days were spent almost exclusively in Charles’ company, as Erik insisted on being the one to look after him while he rested. They took McCoy’s suggestions to heart and altered Charles’ diet, increasing the quantity of fruits and vegetables in his meals while decreasing the amount of meats and cheeses. His lover took the myriad changes in stride – and it did seem to help alleviate the worst of the nausea – though he balked most furiously at the restrictions imposed on his intake of coffee, tea and alcohol.

He also took the opportunity to speak with Azazel and Mrs. Pryde, to ask for their help communicating his worries to the household. All of Erik’s servants had been with him since he was a boy, and he knew that they held an unnatural fondness for their Master. They were loyal and dedicated and could be counted on to exercise discretion, though Erik still felt the need to make clear his expectations as it pertained to Charles. For his lover’s sake more than his own, Erik had been more circumspect in showing his affection, though it was nigh on impossible to hide given that they still shared the same bed – and left ample evidence of it – even after the baby’s conception.

When Dr. McCoy returned the following week, he was quick to comment on his patient’s marked improvement. Nausea still affected Charles on most mornings Erik had worried, but the doctor assured them that it was quite a normal occurrence. He even gave Charles leave to travel home and see his sister, for it was his lover’s wish to deliver the pregnancy news in person, and to visit his home during the Christmas season.

And so, it was with great reluctance that Erik saw Charles off a few days later, departing by carriage and accompanied by his valet for their stay at Xavier Manor. He knew that Charles would only be gone a short while, and yet his heart already felt pain, for it could not escape the looming spectre of a more permanent parting.

His foul mood persisted for the entire day and then into the next, causing an annoyed Emma to suggest that he take a spontaneous trip to London. Better to get out and make himself useful, she’d said, and see to his holdings, instead of pining for hours in the library like a love-struck fool.

It was most certainly an exaggeration, Erik scoffed, though he acknowledged that it would be a good use of his time. He took Azazel with him, for company and for his financial acumen, and spent a productive day going over various business with his solicitors.  His steward made no comment at the new accommodations Erik added into his will – for both Charles and the baby – and only smiled knowingly when he later spent a tidy sum on the finest of drinking chocolate to take back to Charlton Park.

His trip home was unexpectedly delayed by heavy snowfall, and he arrived hours later than planned, after the dinner hour and past Charles’ anticipated return. He was startled to see Sean – face pale and anxious – waiting for him when he stepped through the front door, making his gut instantly twist with worry for his pregnant lover.

“Where is he,” Erik barked, shrugging out of his coat and handing it to the butler Mr. Quested. “Did something happen? Is he alright? Is the baby alright?”

“Sir, Mr. Xavier is fine, sir. He’s in the parlour with My Lady, waiting on your return. I only wished to tell you that we experienced some difficulties on the way back—”

“What difficulties? What happened?” Erik interrupted, already striding through the corridors to the east wing, Sean struggling to keep up without breaking into a run. And though Sean assured him that Charles was home and ostensibly unharmed, he would not be satisfied until he saw the truth of it with his own eyes.

“Our carriage hit a rough patch on the road,” Sean explained, and Erik did slow down then to let him catch his breath, and to allow Erik himself to straighten his tailcoat. “The wheel was damaged, and we couldn’t continue without repairs. Luckily, a stranger came to our aid and escorted Mr. Xavier home in his own carriage.”

Erik let out a sigh of relief. “That _was_ lucky, and very kind of the stranger to offer assistance. Tell me, who was it that provided aid to Mr. Xavier? I would like to extend my personal thanks for the kindness shown.”

“He introduced himself as Captain Steven Rogers, Sir, of His Majesty’s Royal Navy. My Lady is with him and Mr. Xavier now, taking refreshments in the parlour.”

“Ah very good,” he replied as they neared the wide double doors, beyond which Erik could already hear Charles’ warm chuckle amidst the low buzz of conversation, “I can thank him directly, for bringing you both home safe.”

Sean smiled to be included in Erik’s regard, and nodded as he turned to retrace his steps through the house. Erik took another moment then to adjust his collar before he stepped into the room, his relief almost tangible when his lover’s attention immediately turned his way. Charles looked the same as he ever did; perfectly groomed and impeccable, looking none the worse for having spent some undue time out in the bitter cold.

“Erik! You’re back!” Charles exclaimed, and it was likely that he would have rushed into Erik’s arms if not for the presence of company. But it was Emma who stood to welcome him, looping her arm through his and directing his attention from Charles towards the third occupant in the room.

“I’m glad to see you returned and in one piece,” she said, her lips curled in the slightest hint of a smile. He knew that she was greatly relieved to know Erik was also safe, for Emma loved him dearly, as he loved her in returned. “And we have the Captain to thank for escorting Charles home to us, when the carriage was broken down by the side of the road.”

He turned finally to the blond man who rose to greet him and realized with sudden clarity who he was – Captain Steven Rogers was a frequent topic when conversing with Lord and Lady Stark, who liked to regale their guests with the heroics of their good friend. The Captain had led many battles in England’s ongoing war against the French and had only recently retired his commission to return home. By all accounts the man was a fine leader and a brave soldier, and now that Erik had seen him in person – every bit as handsome and impressive as the reputation that preceded him.

“Captain Rogers,” he said, offering the man a sincere smile as they shook hands, “you have my thanks and my gratitude for your help today. Charles is very dear to us; it would have distressed our entire household if any illness or accident had befallen him on the road.”

“Earl Lehnsherr, please, there’s no need to thank me. I was happy to assist a stranger in need, and happier still when it turned out to be Charles in the carriage. It was a quite welcome surprise to be reunited with young Master Xavier after so many years away.”

Erik felt his enthusiasm falter at the revelation. “Oh…I did not realize you two were well acquainted.”

“The Starks were good friends with my father, and so we visited Stark Manor often while he still lived,” Charles answered, returning to his place beside Captain Rogers on the sofa, as Emma led Erik to his seat across the way. “I profess to have followed Tony and Steve – that would be Lord Stark and the Captain – on many misadventures in their youth, though I was but a young child then—”

“Young, but utterly brilliant already,” Rogers interjected with an almost painful sincerity, “I’ve always thought that Charles had one of the brightest minds I’d ever known.”

Charles did not flush, but it was evident from the way his eyes danced that the Captain’s words pleased him immensely. “And you are every bit as kind and gracious as I remember. I can’t tell you how glad I am to see you again…I know Tony must be just as thrilled to have you back in England where you belong.”

“Oh, now I understand!” Emma exclaimed, “it’s you! You’re the reason the Starks are throwing a ball to welcome the New Year! They mean to re-introduce you to polite society I’m sure—”

“And knowing Tony he is likely set on some unwanted match making, to try and get me to settle down once and for all,” Rogers groaned.

Erik could not help but ask, “Then you are not married, Captain?”

“I am not,” Rogers said, and at least he did not look to Charles as he answered, “I have been in the Royal Navy for many years, Earl Lehnsherr, and there was never any time or inclination on my part to find a spouse. Perhaps now though…”

Charles laughed. “Perhaps now you will find someone like Tony’s Virginia, who can manage to keep you out of trouble.”

“Perhaps,” the Captain replied good naturedly, “though it will be a tall order indeed.”

The banter continued as they caught up on their respective families and Rogers’ experiences abroad, leaving the Lehnsherrs to feel slightly awkward – as though their presence was an intrusion upon the unexpected reunion. Erik did his best to be a good host, and even offered to have the Captain stay the night and wait out the storm, though it was admittedly difficult to watch his beloved smile at another and hang onto his every word.

He knew well that his feelings were ugly and unwarranted, for Charles had given Erik no reason to doubt him or the love that they shared. But his own shortcomings proved glaring in the light of another’s merits; an alpha unmarried, with good reputation and a small fortune beholden to no one. Rogers was everything that Charles _deserved_ , and perhaps their eventual union might have been the natural course of things if fate – and Erik – had not seen fit to intervene.

It was two hours later before they all retired for the night, and another half an hour before Erik deemed it safe to make his nightly trek to Charles’ bedroom. As usual he slipped in quietly without knocking, and found his lover snuggled under the covers and reading by candlelight. The smile he gifted Erik with was both warm and inviting, and did much to ease the tension that had plagued him for much of the night.

“I wasn’t sure if you would come,” Charles said, as Erik took the hand he offered and quickly joined him in the bed.

“Why would you think that?” Erik mused, already distracted by the distinctive scent that Charles carried, which never failed to ignite a wild fervour in his blood. He pressed kisses against Charles’ neck and on any exposed skin he could touch, eager to reacquaint himself after too many days apart. “I have missed you more than anything. Wild horses could not drag me from your side.”

Charles laughed. “I have missed you too, so very much, my darling. I only thought that you might have chosen to be cautious, since we have a guest staying with us overnight.”

Erik stilled, and slowly eased himself back until he could look upon Charles’ face. “Why would I do that? I have nothing to hide.”

“I did not mean—”

“Perhaps you are the one that wishes for discretion,” Erik interrupted, “so that the Captain does not disapprove of us.”

“Well…yes, of course we should be discreet, my love. Steve does not know our circumstances, or the true nature of your relationship with Emma. He would certainly assume us of adultery, and rightly judge us poorly for our actions.”

“And you would not want the Captain to think poorly of you, I’m sure,” he replied, and though Charles stilled he could not stop himself from adding, “it would be better to stay in his good graces, should you choose to leave us after the baby’s birth. And though it pains me more than anything to say this, I must not be selfish and think only of myself…”

“Erik, what are you—”

“No please, let me say this,” Erik pleaded, and though he was clearly puzzled, Charles only smiled gently and squeezed his hand. “I love you more than life itself, and gladly would I have you by my side for now and always. But Charles, I cannot ask it of you – I _will_ not, for in staying here with us you would forgo all hopes of a spouse and family to call your own. I…I would not blame you, or hold you to any words we’ve spoken in passion, should you choose to marry the Captain and—”

“Oh,” Charles exclaimed, his eyes going wide with understanding, “Erik…you think that…with Steve? No, no! That is not what I want at all! Why would you think such a thing of me? Of _us_? Do you have so little faith in our love that you think I would throw myself into the arms of any random alpha who might marry me? While I still carry our child in my womb?”

It was difficult to bear the full weight of Charles’ displeasure, and yet Erik knew he would bear it and much more without complaint if it meant his lover could choose the course of his own life; that he did not feel pressured or unduly swayed by Erik’s own self-interest. “No. You know that I hold you in the highest esteem, Charles. That is why I would not have you stay here now, and then live to regret me.”

For long moments Charles did not speak, though he continued to cradle Erik’s palm gently within his own. Then he pulled Erik down with him until they lay facing each other on the bed, and placed Erik’s hand over the spot where the baby rested.

“I love you, and only you, Erik Lehnsherr,” he said, with a hint of amusement in the reprimand, “I am not so fickle as to fall in and out of love so easily. Steve is my friend, and I am very fond of him, but what I feel for him cannot compare to my utter devotion to you.”

Erik kissed him tenderly, and sighed. “I’m sorry, Charles. I only wish happiness for you, whatever it may be.”

“I would have told you already, if you had not insisted on marrying me off,” he tutted, and Erik could not help but kiss him again, until Charles playfully shoved him back. “I would have told you that I spoke with Raven, and she encouraged me to stay here with you, forever.”

“Truly? Does she…does she realize what it means for your family name? And her own marriage prospects?”

“She does,” Charles insisted, “and though we argued for a long time in the end she made it clear. She does not want me to give up my happiness for her sake, for she is perfectly content to live as she does now without expectation.”

He did not quite believe his own ears, and had to ask, “And you are truly going to stay here? With me and the baby? So we can love each other as a family and never have to be apart?”

All his life Erik would remember Charles’ face in that moment, his eyes warm and smile soft as he cupped Erik’s cheek and whispered, “I will stay, and love you and the baby for the rest of our days.”


	3. The Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles and Erik settle into their new lives together. And he and the Lehnsherrs attend a lavish New Year's ball.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not mean for the ball to take up an entire chapter but well...here it is lol. That MIGHT mean the fic will go from the planned 4 chapters to 5; we will see how it goes. The angsty stuff happens next chapter, though we will eventually (eventually!) get that happy ending I promised. :D

When Charles was a child he dreamed often of travel, to see the farthest reaches of the British Empire and experience the wonders of the world firsthand. He craved adventure, and had an insatiable hunger for knowledge, qualities that his father had indulged against his mother’s wishes. At the time it had engendered in him no small amount of resentment, for he had yet to understand the rules that existed for any omega of wealth or lineage, limitations that she tried to shield from him in her own way.

You could hardly be disappointed, she reckoned, if you did not know what it was that you missed. 

It was a lesson that Charles was learning now on a daily basis, small increments of a life he was half-living. He had love yes – loyal and true and better than he could have ever imagined – and carried within him the seed that would eventually bear fruit of their passion. But it was ever a hidden, secret thing that could not be shown or spoken of; he could not hold Erik’s hand, or even kiss his cheek in the presence of others. And while Erik doted on him, and the servants pretended not to notice their Master still frequented his bed, and Emma took great care to see to his comfort and welcome…

Well, Erik was not _his,_ not truly and completely, the way Charles didn’t even know he’d wanted until he fell hopelessly in love with a married man.

He told himself it was enough, to be with Erik and know Charles had his whole heart, and tried not to be envious of the easy affection his lover could share so openly with his wife. It was not a lie when he promised to stay forever; that he would happily forgo a marriage of his own to stay at Erik’s side. But it was much easier to imagine the joy of it, and welcome the sacrifice in giving up so much for love; easier than to live it day to day and hour by hour, and know in his heart of hearts that he wanted _more_.  

Erik for his part, veritably blossomed with each day spent in Charles’ company, and each night spent wrapped in his arms, cradling the slight swell of his belly. He sang lullabies to the baby that he had learned from his beloved mother, and breathed sweet words of tender devotion into Charles’ ears. They designed the layout of the nursery, and argued good-naturedly over the baby’s education, all as they lay laughing and spent under the covers of a bed that was _his_ and not _theirs_.

But these were the tiniest of blemishes in a sea of happiness, far outweighing the imperfections of an otherwise blissful union. And now that no more lies and misunderstandings lay between them, Charles could finally allow himself to embrace his new life at Charlton Park. Perhaps if his interactions had remained solely within the confines of the estate, with people who all adored Erik and respected his feelings for Charles, his convictions would not be so soon and so sorely tested.

* * *

 

The day before New Year’s arrived in a flurry of activity, with Emma spending much of it in her rooms getting ready for the big event. Even Erik and Charles found themselves caught up in the excitement, for the Countess had insisted that they all be outfitted with new clothes for the Starks’ lavish ball. In particular the Lehnsherrs’ tailor in London had been commissioned to produce a new tailcoat in royal blue for Charles, along with a custom pair of silk breeches to accommodate the growing swell of his womb. It was far too luxurious, he’d tried to argue, though Emma had only smiled at him fondly and patted his cheek.

Erik on the other hand, could scarcely take his eyes off of him, and proceeded to strip Charles _out_ of his finery, distracting them both rather thoroughly from their task. It took Sean’s discreet knocking to drag them from each other’s arms, the reminder that they were nearing the time for departure. Suitably embarrassed at being caught, Charles scrambled to dress himself, though not before Erik laughed and kissed him over and over again until Charles shoved him out the door.

They piled into the carriage soon after, and set off through the lightly falling snow for the Stark’s country estate. It had been years since Charles’ last visit to Stark Manor and the last time he saw Tony, though not from any cooling of their fast friendship; rather, the young Lord Stark had been living and traveling abroad for years, and only recently returned to England upon the death of his father. It eased some of Charles’ worries about attending the ball, knowing that the host at least would be kind and welcoming. He had no illusions that the evening would be an easy one, for the surrogacy made him a prime source of gossip for everyone in attendance. But for Tony - and the fact that this would likely be the last ball he’d ever be invited to, once it became known that he intended to stay on with the Lehnsherrs -  Charles would bear the scrutiny of a few whispers behind his back.

His assumptions though, were thoroughly dashed the moment they stepped through the ballroom door.

“ _The Earl and Countess Lehnsherr, and Master Charles Xavier_.”

 The announcement drew the attention of everyone in the room, faces turned towards the new arrivals with barely disguised curiosity. Charles knew better than to think that they were looking at the Lehnsherrs, though they made the most striking of couples, with Erik sharply handsome in a maroon tailcoat and Emma resplendent in white. Easily the most attractive pair in the room, they were certainly no strangers to such open admiration, and Charles already felt rather awkward and plain in their wake. But it was immediately clear that all eyes were in fact drawn inexorably to _Charles -_ and to the babe that was definitely not yet showing through his clothes - just a few steps behind the Earl and his wife.

Oh how he wished that he was the one on Erik’s arm, and not Emma.

Thankfully, their arrival also drew the attention of the Duke and Duchess, who greeted the Lehnsherrs warmly, before Tony proceeded to pull Charles into a not-altogether appropriate embrace.

Not that Charles ever expected Anthony Stark of all people to have much use for rules and etiquette.

“Charles! Charles, look at you! All grown up and so handsome! And you never told me; not once, not in any of your letters—”

Lady Stark – who Charles knew of course as the lovely Virginia Potts – rolled her eyes and laughed. “Not everyone is so vain as you, Tony, to write about their own attractiveness to a friend.” She turned her attention then to the Lehnsherrs and added, “We’re so pleased to see you both, Earl and Countess Lehnsherr, and of course our darling Charles…it’s so good to have you all here with us to ring in the new year.”

Erik merely nodded, though Emma was quick to reply, “We are honored to have been invited to such a splendid event.”

Charles smiled. “Yes. Thank you for your invitation, Your Grace—”

Tony snorted. “ _Your Grace_ , he says.”

“Hush you,” Virginia chided, though her lips were curved in an indulgent smile. “Charles has always had impeccable manners, especially compared to you.”

Now it was Erik’s turn to tease Charles as he added, “Charles has shown himself to be quite remarkable; well learned and well mannered. Indeed it has been a privilege to host him in our home.”

Tony’s eyes bulged a little in disbelief, no doubt at the effusiveness of Erik’s compliment; Charles knew Erik well enough to know that this was surprising behavior from someone so normally stoic and taciturn.  But any jest he might have made was stymied by a light squeeze of his arm by Lady Stark, and Tony closed his mouth abruptly, and then grinned.

“I was looking forward to dancing with you tonight, Charles, like we used to as children,” Tony said, and Charles threw his head back and laughed as the others looked on with amusement. “My father made me take many lessons of course, as befitting a future Duke and I happily roped in my friends to keep me company. Charles was a wonderful dance partner, and more graceful than I could ever hope to be.”

Charles smiled, and could not help but tease, “You eventually got the hang of it, though my feet suffered much abuse in the process.”

Their laughter did much to alleviate Charles’ unease, with the Starks and the Lehnsherrs’ proving to be a suitable distraction from all the prying eyes. He knew however, that it would not be so for the rest of the evening, for the Starks had many guests to greet and the Lehnsherrs would be required to circulate amongst the various attendees.  Of course, Charles intended to spend most of his time at Raven’s side, and pretend not to know that his every move would be scrutinised and dissected with great interest.

“Well, I’m afraid my host duties will keep me from proving what a great dancer I’ve become,” Tony said, and then his smile widened as his eyes flickered towards something just beyond Charles’ shoulder. “But don’t worry; I’m sure the good Captain will keep you suitably occupied.”

“And it would be my pleasure,” a familiar voice answered, and when Charles turned it was to see the smiling face of his childhood crush, looking at him with such genuine fondness that it set his stomach aflutter. It did not help that Steve was in full dress uniform, sword hanging at this side and clad in the fine navy blue coat that signified his officer’s rank in the Royal Navy. With his blond hair and blue eyes he painted a devastatingly handsome picture, and for a moment all Charles could remember was how much he had dreamed of this as a boy of ten; to someday be swept away in the arms of this kind and soft-spoken man.

Of course Steve knew nothing of his feelings, though Charles doubted that it would have made any difference if he did. There was the age difference of course – Steve and Tony were five years older, and Charles was the annoying younger sibling foisted upon them by their parents. He thought too that the two would eventually marry, close as they’ve always been, and harbored his admiration for Steve in secret so as not to affect his relationship with his friends. Unexpectedly, omega Tony had married the beta Virginia Potts instead, a scandal in its own day that had at once delighted the future Duke and exasperated his father Howard.

And then Steve had shipped off to war, and eventually, Charles had fallen hopelessly in love with Erik Lehnsherr.

“I remember those dance lessons all too well, Tony, and that of the three of us, Charles was the only one with any natural talent or grace.”

Charles grinned, ignoring Tony’s knowing chuckle as he grasped the proffered hand and said, “Now _you’re_ the one teasing me, Captain. I dare say some things never change.”

“ _Some_ things change,” Steve murmured, with just the lightest squeeze of Charles’ fingers before he bent to kiss Virginia’s hand and then Emma’s in turn. “But in this case, the Duke is right. I hope you’ll honor me with a dance tonight, Mr. Xavier, though my skills may prove quite rusty from disuse.”

At his side Erik cleared his throat, imperceptible to all but Charles who was acutely aware of his lover’s ever steady presence. Erik was sensitive to his friendship with Steve he knew, even without any knowledge of his childhood fantasies, and would not be pleased to see them spend time together at the ball. But he also understood his lover’s possessive tendencies, especially now that he was carrying their child, and that he would likely disapprove of _any_ dance partner Charles picked that evening. And since etiquette – and their need to keep up appearances – demanded that they keep their distance in public, Erik himself could not be a viable choice.

Though if Charles was being honest, he _wanted_ to dance with the good Captain, if only to fulfil that long-ago dream, and maybe pretend a little that he was being properly courted…

…something he would never have the chance to experience for real, now that his heart and soul belonged to a married man.

“Yes,” he replied, pushing down the sliver of guilt that threatened his good mood. If this was to be his last ball, and the last time he would be so welcomed amongst his peers, then Charles intended to enjoy every moment he could to its fullest. “I would be delighted to dance with you, Captain Rogers.”

Having given his answer, which garnered him yet another warm smile, he allowed the Lehnsherrs to lead him away as the others continued to greet new guests that came through the door.  Erik’s unease was palpable as they crossed the room, his back noticeably stiff with tension that Charles wanted desperately to soothe, though of course it was impossible to do so without being seen by prying eyes.  But then the light touch of Emma’s hand seemed to bring his lover back from the edge of a brewing storm, and he was once again struck by the depth of their bond, and how so much of Erik was still unknowable to him, even if his love for Charles was assured.

When they were suitably situated – off to the side of the ballroom, where they could not be overheard – Erik leaned into Charles’ space and then hesitated, a frown masking the array of complicated emotions that flit across his face. When he finally spoke it was with an air of resignation, and perhaps no small amount of disappointment, and Charles realized belatedly just how much these first few minutes of interaction had already begun to weigh on his lover.

“You will remember to rest? And not to push yourself too hard, yes?” Erik murmured, and he looked rather desperate, as though he had to physically restrain himself from gathering Charles into his arms. It was difficult to stifle his own instinct to respond, and only a warning look from Emma kept Charles from gently reaching to clasp Erik’s arm.

“I will. Now go and enjoy your evening.”

Erik shook his head, even as Emma sighed. “I could not. I wish only to be by your side and to dance with you all night.”

“Oh, Erik—”

“You must stop this nonsense at once,” Emma said, and though her words were sharp her tone was not unkind, “or do you want Charles to feel guilty for enjoying himself? You know what this evening means to him, in the company of his family and friends. As difficult as it is for you both it will be over soon enough, and we will all be home again in just a few hours.”

Whether it was Emma’s candid reminder or the thought of returning later to Charles’ bed he didn’t know, but Erik smiled then, small but genuine as he answered, “Emma is right, as she often is much to my annoyance; it is selfish of me to want to keep you all to myself, Charles. I want you to enjoy the party, and know that your happiness is what matters the most.”

Charles smiled, and wished he could hold Erik’s hand as he said in return, “As yours is to me, darling. I will be careful, with myself and the babe, I promise.”

He watched then as Emma led the way, guiding Erik towards their mutual friends the MacTaggerts, newly arrived at the ball. Charles himself took a deep breath before heading towards his own family, though by then Raven had already crossed the length of the room to meet him, throwing her arms around him in a tight embrace.

“Charles! Oh, you look so handsome tonight. Is that a new jacket? Was it a gift from your lo—”

“Shh Raven,” he chided, shooting her a warning glance even as she rolled her eyes.

“I was just asking if it was a gift from your _lovely sponsors_ ,” she said with exaggerated patience, “please do give me some credit for knowing what _is_ and _isn’t_ appropriate discussion at a ball.”

Charles grinned. “Sorry. It’s hard to remember you’re not a child anymore, dear Raven, since you still act like one.”

“Oh, is that any way to speak to your favorite sister?”

“You’re my only sister, though I concede that you are indeed my favorite.”

Bolstered by Raven’s presence the two set off arm in arm towards mother and Kurt, who gave Charles no more than a perfunctory greeting before turning back to their discussion with Christopher and Katherine Summers. Instead of disappointment, Charles was relieved by their lack of interest; his current arrangement with the Lehnsherrs meant that he was free from their match making attempts now and for the foreseeable future.

Luckily, Raven was also largely safe from their meddling, for she was both a beta and younger than Charles, and therefore not expected to marry to ensure the family’s continued fortune. It gave her a degree of freedom as well as the luxury of choice, though she had been adamant that neither marriage nor children suited her sensibilities.

Charles wondered if it might change her mind if she met the right person; someone who intrigued her as much as Erik had instantly captivated him all those months ago at the MacTaggerts’ ball. But the thought came and went rather quickly, as Raven was already pulling him to the middle of the ballroom floor, to join in on the first of the evening’s dances.

He danced first with Raven, and then with Moira MacTaggert who was dressed in a cream coloured gown that highlighted her lustrous dark brown hair. Moira had been one of the alphas who came to Kurt with an offer of marriage, only to be turned away in favor of Colonel Stryker’s – and then Erik’s – surrogacy request. And though Moira herself was still interested in Charles, he knew that her family no longer deemed him a suitable choice to be their son-in-law.

It was likely that even their continued friendship would be forbidden, once Charles made it known that he was staying permanently in the Lehnsherr household.

When the dance ended and Moira excused herself politely, Charles returned to Raven’s side and took the opportunity to rest. They admired the latest fashions on abundant display, and shared gossip about various feuds and potential courtships, and all the while Charles’ eyes followed Erik around the ballroom, wondering how it would feel to be escorted openly on his lover’s arm.

Eventually his musings were cut short by the appearance of Dr. McCoy, who smiled warmly, if a little timidly when Charles introduced him to his sister.

“Dr. McCoy, this is my sister, Raven Xavier. Raven, this is Henry McCoy, the kind doctor who has been looking after my well-being at Charlton Park.”

Raven smiled as McCoy quickly offered a respectful bow. “Dr. McCoy, it’s a pleasure to meet your acquaintance. I cannot thank you enough for watching over my big brother. You must let me know if he gives you any trouble; he’s always been a notoriously poor patient.”

The doctor – who had always seemed to Charles just a little shy and socially awkward – positively beamed at Raven’s jest. “The pleasure is all mine, Miss Xavier. Your brother speaks most fondly of you during our sessions together. And I must say that he makes a most admirable patient. You can be assured of my dedication to providing the very best care possible to Mr. Xavier.”

“That is kind of you, doctor,” Raven said with great sincerity, and McCoy veritably glowed under her appraising words. “Charles is lucky to have you. And the Lehnsherrs too of course, for securing the services of such a capable physician. How is it that you’ve acquired such an impressive reputation already, Dr. McCoy, at such a young age?”   

It was fascinating to watch their interaction, with Charles all but forgotten as McCoy launched into a thorough if modest re-telling of his education and apprenticeship in London’s largest hospitals. He spoke passionately and eloquently of his work with children, and in turn Raven showed a genuine interest and admiration for his life’s calling. And when McCoy – or _Henry_ , as he insisted being called by the siblings – finally asked Raven to dance, she was practically vibrating with excitement. Charles could only stand back and watch with fond amusement, as his sister and McCoy made their way eagerly onto the dance floor.

But he was alone for no more than a few minutes before Colonel Stryker appeared suddenly at his side.

“Mr. Xavier, what a pleasure it is to see you,” Stryker said, with a slight gleam in his eye that set Charles immediately on edge. “And where are your sponsors? Earl Lehnsherr and his lovely wife? It seems rather discourteous to abandon you in your condition.”

“My ‘condition’, Colonel? I’m not sure I understand,” he replied, feigning ignorance in the hopes that Stryker would take his hint and leave off any mention of surrogacy. It was highly inappropriate to discuss these matters openly, and certainly not in the midst of a ball, surrounded as they were by so many friends and acquaintances.

But the Colonel only grinned, and tapped his cane absently against the marble floor. He was an admittedly distinguished man in his fifties, with graying hair and a confident demeanor, and eyes that were now scanning up and down Charles’ body, sharp and considering. They came to rest for long moments on the slight curve hidden carefully under his jacket, before he looked up and smiled again, and then leaned ever closer.

Charles had to fight the urge to take a step back and wrap both arms around his stomach.

“Now, now, let’s not pretend you don’t understand my meaning,” Stryker said, “I am referring of course, to the Lehnsherr heir you already carry. I’m a bit surprised, that’s all…I would have expected the Earl to keep you _closer at hand_ , Mr. Xavier. For the babe’s comfort and safety of course, as a proper alpha should.”

“How did you—”

Stryker laughed. “Your stepfather shared the good news with me just now. I must say that I’m still quite disappointed with how things turned out….though I suppose I can’t blame Lehnsherr for outbidding me for the privilege—”

“Colonel Stryker, I don’t think—”

 “—of siring a babe with such a young  and attractive omega,” he continued, oblivious – or more likely – uncaring of Charles’ growing discomfort. “You made quite a sought after surrogate, Mr. Xavier, and as it turns out, rightly so! Pregnant already! So young and fertile…”

Charles scanned the ballroom, looking first for Erik, who unfortunately was deep in discussion with the Duke, and then for anyone else he could signal to intervene; to extricate him from Stryker’s conversation without drawing undue attention or offering the Colonel insult.

“…though I expect the Earl must have been quite _diligent_ with his duties, to see his seed take hold so soon after planting.” 

Cold panic surged up Charles’ spine, enough to overwhelm the indignation he felt at the Colonel’s crass insinuations. He could not tell if Stryker somehow knew of his relationship with Erik, or even of the man’s intentions; why he would choose to approach Charles here of all places and make such crude remarks in his presence. It  angered him to be treated so, as though the Xavier name did not deserve his respect, and it frightened him too, the thought of being shamed publicly in front of his family and his closest friends.

He could not think of a response that would not infuriate the Colonel and cause a scene, and so said nothing, even as Stryker chuckled at his now obvious discomfort. It was becoming clear to Charles though that the man’s pride had been wounded when his surrogacy agreement was rescinded, and perhaps – with the way the Colonel was looking at him – harboring a very real desire to have Charles in his bed.

“I’m sorry, Colonel, but I’m afraid—”

“—that you must excuse us,” Steve interrupted, and Charles almost collapsed with relief at the sight of the Captain, lips pressed uncharacteristically in a tight frown. “But Mr. Xavier has promised me the pleasure of his company for this next dance.”

Stryker did not seem to notice the stiffness of Steve’s shoulders or the way he was half shielding Charles with his body and said, “Captain Rogers! How good it is to see you! My son Jason is here tonight…you remember, don’t you? He’s recently come of age and I’m sure he would love to meet a war hero like you.”

Steve, bless his composure, only smiled thinly at Stryker’s blatant matchmaking. “Of course I would be happy to speak with Mr. Stryker, though I’m afraid it must wait until I’ve danced with Mr. Xavier. Now if you’ll excuse us, Colonel,” he said, and then he gently escorted Charles away with a light squeeze of his hand.

They did not stop on the dance floor as expected, skirting the line of smiling dancers as Steve guided them out of the ballroom and down the hall, putting some much needed distance between Charles and Stryker. The Captain did not let go of his arm until they entered the empty library, the terse cut of his lips softening with worry as Charles took a seat on the sedan and sighed.

“Thank you for your timely rescue,” he said, as the tension slowly dissipated from his shoulders. The anger had burned away with each step taken, leaving only embarrassment over Stryker’s sly digs and his own foolishness. He should have expected his stepfather’s blatant indiscretion, and properly armored himself for just such a confrontation.  

Steve smiled, and sat down beside him on the sedan. “I’m sure you needed no rescuing,” he replied, his smile growing a little wider when Charles huffed in disbelief. “You would have put Stryker in his place, I have no doubt. Only, I did not want your evening ruined on his account, and thought to spare you any more time in his boorish company. I hope you’ll forgive me if I overstepped.”

Charles laughed. “Please, you did me the greatest of favors,” he answered, though he sobered quickly at the next thought that crossed his mind. “Did you…how much of our conversation did you overhear?”

“Enough to know that the Colonel behaved poorly,” Steve said, “and nothing else that shall ever be repeated. Your business is your own, Mr. Xavier; you can be assured of my utmost discretion.”

Shame, hot and visceral curdled in his gut, the thought that Captain Steven Rogers, hero of the British Empire and one that Charles had looked up to all his life knew everything that had happened to him in the years since their parting; his surrogacy bought and sold by his own family, and his pregnancy by one who was not his spouse. No, he was not sorry – would _never_ be sorry – for loving Erik or for bearing their child, but oh how his pride stung at the thought of losing Steve’s good opinion or to see any pity and censure in those kind blue eyes.

“I did not tell you of my arrangement with the Lehnsherrs, when I first saw you again and you escorted me back to Charlton Park,” he murmured. It felt like an unburdening, to reveal all that discomfited him to someone so removed from his circumstances. “We were newly reunited, and I thought to keep my surrogacy secret for just a little longer. I wished to be seen as your friend Charles, as you remembered me from long ago, and not as the scion of a disgraced House and a social pariah. Even tonight I had hoped to continue the illusion, to pretend that my life and my choices were still my own.”

“Charles--”

“I was foolish to think that I could have this; one last night of dancing and good companionship before…” He shook his head and sighed. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll be fine Captain; you should go back to the party and attend to the Duke’s other guests. I’ll be in shortly.”

He closed his eyes and waited, unwilling to watch the Captain leave even if he was the one who encouraged the exit. It surprised him then when Steve took up his hand instead and replied, “You are not foolish for wanting happiness, Charles, and I shall not abandon you, tonight or any night hereafter. You are my friend, and you may count on my support in all things. I only wished I could have done more…”

Charles turned to him and blinked, confused by his words and the deep furrow in his brow. “I don’t understand. What could you have possibly done for me when you’ve only newly returned to England?”

The Captain sighed wearily, and squeezed Charles’ hand. “I already knew, about your family’s troubles before your surrogacy was set. Tony wrote to me while I was abroad, and we discussed ways we could possibly assist you. But things happened too fast for our intervention…I’m sorry Charles. It pains me to see you so unhappy.”  

It was a shock to hear Steve’s revelation at first, until his mind slowly absorbed all its implications. His heart warmed to know that his childhood friends had not forgotten him, though their lives had drawn them inexorably apart, as did the news that Steve had been aware of the surrogacy during his visit to Charlton Park. The Captain had not treated him differently then – or now  –  knowing his role in the Lehnsherrs’ home, and did not appear to judge him poorly as he’d previously feared.  

It made him feel brave, and he squeezed Steve’s hand gently in return. “I’m not unhappy, at least not for the reasons you think.”

Steve shook his head. “You owe me no explanation, nor should you feel the need to lessen the burden on my conscience by hiding your own discontent.”

“No Steve, you don’t understand,” Charles said. He smiled, joyous and relieved at being able to share his secret with his friend. “Truly I have never been happier. For I have found love – true, all-abiding love with Erik – Earl Lehnsherr, and we will soon expect a child together. It is a long story, but please trust me when I say that he does not dishonor his marriage for love of me, and that the Countess is in full support of our bond.”

For a moment Charles worried what the Captain would say, as he stared fixedly at Charles for long seconds without comment. No doubt he was working through the cause and effect of Charles’ declaration, and the challenges he would face after the baby’s birth. But then he smiled, and it was an honest one, and Charles took it for understanding if not outright support.

“If the Earl makes you happy then I offer you my sincerest of congratulations,” Steve answered with a warm smile. “You have always been wise beyond your years, Charles, so I know I don’t need to ask if you’re certain of your choice. Instead I offer a promise of continued friendship in the days ahead. You can count on us – on Tony and I both – to hold you always in the highest regard.”

It was more than Charles had ever hoped for, and as good as an oath from someone as loyal and honorable as the Captain. “I can’t tell you what this means to me, and to Erik too. You are a true friend, Steve, and I’m so pleased to have you in my life again.”

“And I with you,” Steve answered, before he stood and offered Charles his hand. “Now, Mr. Xavier, I do believe that you owe me a dance?”

“It would be my pleasure, Captain Rogers,” Charles said with a grin. “Shall we?”

They left the library arm in arm, the incident with Stryker all but forgotten as he led Steve back into the bustling ballroom. With Charles’ spirit restored it was easy to get swept up in the lively music; in the palpable excitement of the other couples that shared the dance floor. He could spare only a quick moment to send Erik – standing alone now, his eyes glued to Charles – a reassuring smile, and then lost himself in the merriment of one, and then a second turn with Steve at his side.

The rest of the evening went without further incident, as Charles kept his distance from Colonel Stryker and any others who he deemed more interested in gossip than in his actual wellbeing. He spent time with Raven of course, and with Dr. McCoy who scarcely left her side, and conversed with the Duke and Duchess again before dinner was served. Then the guests all convened in the huge dining room for a scrumptious meal at the stroke of midnight – everything from soup to pigeon pie, to the tenderest lamb and veal and a multitude of delicious trifles for dessert. Only Erik’s presence could have made it better, though Charles was content to sit and make merry, reveling in his sister’s company so sorely missed. 

It was well into the early morning hours by the time the ball officially ended, and Charles was exhausted as they bundled into the carriage for the ride home. He fell asleep on Erik’s shoulder almost before they’d left the Duke’s estate grounds, and woke only as they pulled up to the front doors of Charlton Park. Somehow, he managed to make his way to his bedroom before he collapsed, too tired to do much more than kick off his shoes and shrug out of his fancy waistcoat.

When he opened his eyes the sun was shining through the windows, and he was warm and snug beneath the covers, cradled gently in his lover’s arms. Charles smiled and pressed a kiss against the hollow of Erik’s throat, nuzzling and inhaling his scent in a haze of utter, contented bliss. The long sleep had served to rejuvenate his tired muscles, and desire now stirred fervently in his groin. Just the thought of Erik’s hands on him was enough to make him ache with want, his body already slicking itself in anticipation as he climbed atop his lover’s still sleeping form.

And then - “If all mornings could begin this way,” Erik murmured, “I shall go to my grave a happy man.”

Charles laughed, and kissed the drowsy smirk playing upon his lips.  “Do not worry, darling. I shall be gentle so as to keep you in good health for the long years to come.”

They divested their night shirts and quickly fell upon each other with joyful enthusiasm, though Erik took great care not to jostle Charles’ slightly rounded belly. But he could do not much more than tense and then moan pitifully, as Charles sank down and took the entirety of his prick within his warm and willing body. Their coupling did not take long at all, their mutual need driving them near to desperation, though they had sated their desires last in the hours leading up to the ball. Charles clenched and writhed while Erik panted and bucked his hips, until Erik’s knot pulsed and swelled and pushed them over the pleasured edge with echoing cries.

In the quiet aftermath Charles shared with Erik the myriad events of the previous night, lazing contentedly as a warm hand brushed lovingly against his cooling skin. For the most part Erik listened attentively without comment, though his grip on Charles tightened at the mention of Stryker and his inappropriate taunting. He tensed too for long moments as Charles recalled his conversation with Steve, and only let out a deep sigh when Charles relayed the Captain’s promise of friendship in the difficult days to come.

“I carry much guilt over your unhappiness,” Erik said, brushing his lips with affection upon Charles’ unruly curls. “For the poor treatment you endured from Stryker, from your family, and from people like the MacTaggerts whom you counted as friends. And I fear it will get worse and no better as long as you’re with me, Charles. I wish…I wish there was something – _anything_ – I could do to make things right.”

“We’ve had this conversation already; too many times–“

“Yes, but you didn’t _know_ until last night,” Erik interrupted harshly, from worry and helpless anger directed outwards; not at Charles but at the rest of the world. “You did not _experience_ it until you came face to face with Stryker’s uncouth words. Do you truly believe you can live an entire lifetime this way? To have no one and nothing but our love, mine and that of our unborn child…I fear it will not be enough.”

“But don’t you see?” Charles explained, turning to face Erik so they could see eye to eye. “I also have my sister’s love and the support of good, loyal friends. Last night only proved to me that I can weather anything, knowing that I’ll always come home to you.”

“Charles—”

“Trust me,” he said, accentuating his statement with a sweet and lingering kiss. “There’s nothing in the wide world that could ever make me leave your side.”

Erik smiled, and kissed him tenderly in return.

* * *

Mere months later Charles would be proven wrong, and these same words would come creeping back to haunt him.

    


	4. A Proposal or Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven's new relationship has a profound impact on Charles' future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's very little Erik in this chapter unfortunately, though the story switches to his POV in the next (and final) chapter. And this is and will remain a Cherik focused story, though I realize I'm throwing quite a lot of obstacles on the road to happily ever after lol. :D

Too soon the chill of winter melted into the warmth of spring, as the household busied itself with preparations for the arrival of the Lehnsherr heir. One of the estate’s many bedrooms was taken over as the baby’s nursery, and filled with beautiful furnishings procured from London’s most renowned master craftsmen. The Lehnsherrs spent weeks too interviewing suitable candidates for the newly created role of head nurse, a position in the household that would be dedicated entirely to the baby’s welfare. Charles did not think it necessary, as he had every intention of being the child’s primary caretaker, though both Erik and Emma insisted that help would be needed _and_ welcomed, especially in the days immediately after the baby’s birth.

Never had Charles experienced such care and concern as he did at Charlton Park, in those waning days and months of his blessedly easy pregnancy. Sean followed him like a dutiful shadow, guarding and anticipating his every need with the fierce attentiveness of a mother wolf defending her cub. Mrs. Pryde sought to fill him with all manner of delicious and healthy foods, directing the kitchen to secure the necessary ingredients for all of Charles’ favorite dishes. The Steward Azazel made trips to London personally to bring him new books and more of the rich drinking chocolate he craved, while Emma herself kept him company in the parlour for hours each day, once the inclement weather – and his increasing size –  made it impossible to venture outdoors for even a short stroll of the estate grounds.

But none could compare to the attention lavished upon him by his devoted lover, who spent his days gazing adoringly at Charles and his nights caressing the growing roundness of his swollen belly. Hands entwined and splayed across Charles’ skin, they delighted each time the babe shifted or kicked, their hearts filled to the brim with joyful eagerness for their imminent meeting. They whispered potential names to one another as they lay in bed, for this child and many more still to come, to fill Charlton Park with such happiness as they’d known when Erik’s mother and Charles’ father yet lived. And Erik made love to him frequently yet ever so gently, making him squirm with each deep and steady thrust, coming apart to sweet promises of fidelity everlasting.

It would have been more than enough, to have just Erik and Emma and the household’s warm regard, for they made sure that Charles never wanted for anything, big or small. But he found himself becoming fast friends with Dr. McCoy over his many visits, and the two enjoyed rousing talks around Henry’s schooling in the sciences and his medical training. His sister too came to Charlton Park often, and alternately stared in awe and teased him mercilessly when his weight gain finally forced him to waddle around like a child taking his first steps.   

And true to his word, Steve continued to be as great a friend to Charles as he’d promised that night at the ball, and attended him regularly along with the Starks. In their company he felt a lack of judgement and disdain, as though his role as a bearer held no sway over their opinion of him. Often he felt the Captain’s eyes follow him from across the room, as they listened to Tony regale them all with another adventure from his time abroad; each time Charles would smile to reassure Steve of his contentment, and be greeted with a comforting smile in return. 

So blissfully happy was he, in the month before the baby’s due date that news he should have clearly foreseen managed to take him completely by surprise.   

“How is the babe, Henry?” he prompted, a little amused at the way Henry immediately jolted back from where ever his mind had been wandering. They were good enough friends now that Charles did not feel bad for prodding him; only curious to the reason behind the doctor’s obvious distraction.

“Fine, perfectly fine. Everything is progressing beautifully” Henry replied, which was reassuring to hear as everything seemed to ache now from the extra weight he carried. “Sorry Charles…please excuse my poor manners. You and the babe have my full attention, I promise.”

Charles waved away his apologies with a smile. “Think nothing of it, though I would have you tell me what’s troubling you. Won’t you tell me what’s wrong?”

The struggle was plain on Henry’s face as he began pacing the length and breadth of Charles’ bedroom, debating the need to unburden himself with the effect it might have on the wellbeing of his pregnant friend. Finally, he shook his head. “It’s nothing. Please don’t worry about me, and concentrate on staying well rested and off your feet. Labor is very strenuous, and I want you to be in your best—”

“Henry,” he said, effectively cutting off his friend’s protests as he tried to ease carefully up and out of his bed. McCoy yelped and scrambled to offer a steady arm, and did not let go until Charles stood securely on his slightly swollen feet. “Tell me. I wish to help.”

It was difficult to remember at times that Henry was younger than Charles, with the accomplishments he’d already made in his chosen field. But his youth was glaringly apparent now as he unconsciously chewed his lip, eyes darting nervously from Charles to his hands and back again.

He seemed so much like a child caught stealing a sweet that Charles had to stifle a laugh.

“Listen, if you’re not—”

“I asked your sister to marry me,” Henry blurted, resuming his pacing back and forth as Charles stood stiffly, shocked silent with disbelief. “I was so sure she would say yes, after all the time we’ve spent together and how much we—” He stopped and shook his head again. “I don’t know what I could have done to make her refuse me so completely.”

Charles swallowed, his throat suddenly dry and said, “I did not realize that…you and Raven.”

Henry at least had the good grace to flinch at the unstated reproach. “We did not mean to keep it from you - that our friendship had blossomed into something more in the months since our first meeting at the New Year’s ball. Your health was paramount of course, and for a while, neither of us really understood what it was that was growing between us. But now…”

“Does Raven feel the same way?” he asked, his mind having already constructed the path of their courtship to the reason for its seemingly abrupt and inexplicable end. “Do you…do you love each other, Henry?”

“ _Yes_.” The response was fervent and full of undisguised longing, and it drove a sorrowed pang deep within Charles’ own heart. “I love her, with all that I am and all that I have! Her happiness is everything to me! Can you begin to understand how it feels, Charles? To finally know a love such as this and be denied?”

Charles heaved a quiet sigh. “I can indeed.”

“And she loves me too!” Henry continued, so caught up in his turmoil that he scarcely heard his friend’s reply. “But she insists that she cannot marry me, and refuses to give me a reason why! If she would only explain I could at least try to make things right.”

Charles thought back to his conversation with Raven – a lifetime ago it seemed now – when he had first confided how deeply he’d fallen in love with the married Earl Lehnsherr. How Raven had supported his desire to stay on permanently at Charlton Park, regardless of the stain it would bring upon the Xavier name. That she had no intentions of ever finding love or being married, and did not want Charles to give up his happiness for some possible future Raven had no desire to claim.

Though Charles of all people knew how quickly circumstances could change, and how love swept away both reason and caution as inexorably as the tide.

“If she told you that she was being disowned—”

“What! Why? How did she—”

Charles raised his hand. “Peace, for that’s not why she refused you. I _am_ asking you to humor my line of questioning however, for I have my reasons. If you do, I will promise to speak to her on your behalf, and get an explanation for her refusal. Do you agree?”

“Yes,” Henry acquiesced readily, and the hope that glimmered in his eyes was plain to see. “I’ll do anything, yes.”

“If my family were to disown her, and she became penniless with no claim to the Xavier name, would you still love her? Marry her?” Charles asked.

“Yes.”

“If the Xaviers were somehow disgraced, and it would affect your standing in the community to be associated with our name, would you still want to be her mate?”

Henry made to reply, but Charles cut him off with a shake of his head. “Think carefully on this, before you answer. Would you still marry Raven if it meant that your own livelihood was affected? If people like the MacTaggerts, or the Summers no longer came calling for your services? What would you give up, my friend, for love of my dear sister?”

To his credit, young McCoy gave his question the careful consideration it deserved, his forehead creasing in consternation as he pondered the scenario through its eventual outcome. Then he took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders.

“I do not love Raven for her name, or for whatever legacy or fortune may come with it,” he stated, with such fire that Charles could not doubt the veracity of every word expressed. “I would gladly forgo the patronage of the English gentry, and be a simple doctor for the common folk if it meant having your sister by my side always. Our lives would be full of laughter and joy, for I swear to care for Raven and cherish her, if she would agree to be my wife.”

Charles forced himself to smile, so that Henry would not guess how his devotion to Raven threw into question his own life and that of Erik and their unborn child. He was certain now, based on Henry’s words that Raven loved him in return, and just as certain that Charles was the reason for her refusal to marry him. His baby sister, who had been his best friend and confidant for all their lives, was giving up her own chance at happiness for Charles’ future at Charlton Park.

“I believe you,” he said, and Henry grasped his hand, clinging to him with relief and wordless hope. “I’ll talk to Raven, for her sake and yours.”

That night Charles tossed and turned for hours, as the conversation with Henry replayed over and over in his mind. His thoughts tumbled from one extreme to the next – from genuine happiness for Raven and Henry, to sorrow and dread over their predicament. It made him feel worse to lay safely enfolded within his lover’s arms, with the taste of Erik’s mouth still emblazoned upon his lips. He should not have such contentment – did not _deserve_ it – when his beloved sister’s heart was broken in two.

“Charles,” Erik whispered, jostled awake no doubt by his restless shifting. He pressed a soft kiss to Charles’ temple, and gently squeezed their entwined hands. “Are you uncomfortable? Would you like me to return to my own room and leave more space for you in the bed?”

“No! Don’t leave me,” he said, the words coming out much sharper and more desperate than he intended. Charles leaned back and relaxed against Erik’s chest, taking a deep breath, and let their connection help loosen the coiled tension in his body. “It’s hard to get comfortable, being this size…I’d rather that you stayed though, if it’s not too much trouble. I find I’ve gotten rather used to having you here, in my bed and sleeping by my side.”

He could feel Erik smile as he nuzzled Charles’ neck with a soft chuckle. “Good. I was so afraid you would ask me to go. I’m quite used to being here too, my love, and will never sleep well again all on my own.”

Charles laughed, and wished he could turn and bury his head against Erik’s chest – an impossible feat in his current condition. “Well I suppose you must stay put then my dear Earl Lehnsherr, for how could I possibly deny you the benefit of my calming presence? If it means something so critical to your wellbeing as a good night’s sleep?”

In lieu of a reply, Erik merely grinned and pressed their mouths together, drawing a heated groan from Charles’ greedy lips. It was easy, letting Erik distract him from the myriad doubts that plagued him; for his body’s need to eclipse his worries as he was teased and touched and driven over the edge. He scarcely heard Erik follow him over before promptly falling asleep, and did not open his eyes again the next morning until well past the breakfast hour.

And though she was constantly on his mind he did not see Raven until three days later, when she arrived for her weekly visit at Charlton Park. She looked lovely as ever, and greeted Charles with a warm smile and a mild jest at his expense, and gave no indication whatsoever that her life had irrevocably changed because of one Henry McCoy.

He waited until the two were alone in the library, after they had taken their regular tea with Emma before revealing his conversation with the good doctor. Raven’s expression did not change in the retelling, not even when Charles relayed Henry’s great distress over her refusal of his marriage offer. He thought perhaps he’d misjudged Raven’s interest in Henry after all, that is until he noticed how straight and still she sat as he talked, and how tightly she was clenching both hands around the armrests of her chair.

“Henry loves you dearly,” he said, as he leaned over to grasp Raven’s hand. “Whatever happens in the future with me and…well, I’m entirely convinced that he truly loves you for _you_ , and not for the Xavier name. He’ll marry you no matter how my choices affect the family’s standing. You must know this.”

Raven scoffed, but twisted her hand around to gently squeeze his in return. “Of course I know. Henry is a good, kind, _loyal_ man…I could think of no one better, with whom to fall in love and share a life together.”

Charles hesitated for a moment before he prompted, “And yet…”

“And yet I can’t ask him to give up all that he’s worked for his entire life; his career and his standing in the community for love of me. It is too large a sacrifice—”

“But he would offer it readily and with his whole heart!” Charles interrupted, for he could not bear to see Raven deny her own happiness for what Henry would so willingly give. “He told me, most sincerely that he would rather be with you and practice medicine for the common folk, than to live a life of luxury and acclaim without you by his side! You are worth any sacrifice, Raven…at the very least you should allow Henry the courtesy of making his own choice!”

Instead of being angry with Charles’ outburst, Raven only sighed deeply and got up out of her chair. She refilled their tea from the pot with a slow and steady hand, taking time to collect her thoughts before she finally answered.

“I know, dear brother, better than anyone what Henry wants, and what he would do if I said yes. And we could be happy indeed, for I too have no use for riches or fair weather friends, and would gladly live the simple life of a country doctor’s wife. But Charles, the guilt would be too much for me, if not now than some day in the future, when I think of the obstacles he’s overcome to have accomplished so much at such a young age.” She took a sip from her tea cup, her eyes glimmering with unshed tears that she tried valiantly to hide. “His parents lost when he was just a child; brought up unwanted and unloved in a relative’s home. Only his natural intelligence and aptitude for medicine rescued him from a life of obscurity. Did you know that his mentor asked him to come back and work at the hospital in London? To train under him directly and eventually take over as head of the department? Think of all the people he could help with his knowledge and his research, in such a role. How can I live with myself knowing all the good he could have done if not for me?”

He understood all too clearly the conflict in Raven’s heart, and how easy it would have been to just take without thought what Henry freely offered. Charles had always loved his sister’s spirit and her strong sense of right and wrong; seeing her now, heart sore yet full of fierce determination, Charles did not think he’d ever loved or admired her more.

Charles took a deep breath and shuddered. “If I came home, after the baby is born, then you and Henry—”

Raven started shaking her head before he could even finish the thought. “No. No, I don’t want you to do that! For goodness’ sake, you and Erik are having a child together! You can’t just leave them—”

“It’s no different than what you’re doing for Henry,” he insisted, ignoring her exasperated huff and familiar glare. “You’re my sister, Raven. I love you more than I can say. I couldn’t live with myself, knowing that my happiness caused you pain.”

“And you expect _me_ to be alright with marrying Henry, knowing that you’d be miserable and alone forever, without anyone at your side?”

“It’s hardly the same, Raven! I’m not—"

“If you choose to come home than it best be for the right reason, Charles. Because you want to marry and have a family and be acknowledged as a parent to the child you carried! Otherwise you and I will live out the rest of our lives in that big house, proudly unwed and driving Mother and Kurt mad, for I won’t marry Henry either way and you can’t make me.”

He laughed, completely caught off guard by Raven’s words and her imperious tone, so reminiscent of their various and frequent arguments as children. Raven grinned before she too burst into laughter, the tears falling freely now down both their faces.

 “Aren’t we a couple of bird witted fools,” Charles sighed, offering his handkerchief with a wry smile. “How lucky we are, to be so unlucky in love.”

“And how unlucky are we,” Raven replied sardonically, “to be so lucky in love.”

In the end she agreed to tell Henry the truth after the baby’s birth, but could not be swayed to change her mind about the proposal. It did little to assuage the guilt that Charles felt in his heart of hearts; though he understood it was Raven’s decision he could not help but feel responsible for her unhappiness. His appetite suffered as did his sleep, but luckily, Charles’ growing discomfort and the baby’s size were reason enough to ease most of Erik’s concerns. 

And though he tried he could not bring himself to confide in his lover; to tell the man he so loved that their life together had again been thrown into question. Charles knew that his wishes would be respected, whatever they may be, which surprisingly made it harder and not easier to share the extent of his turmoil. Why bring unnecessary worry and sorrow to Erik in these happiest of days? When Charles could give him such unbridled joy for these precious and monumental weeks of their lives?

More importantly, could he bear the weight of Erik’s pain on top of his own, when he was veritably drowning in indecision and self-reproach?

A bit of relief came just two weeks before his due date, when Captain Rogers paid him a welcome, if unexpected visit. They spoke briefly about the warmer days of May, and Steve asked after Charles’ and the babe’s health, before he relayed best wishes from the Starks who were away on business in London. If he noticed Charles’ anxiousness he made no note of it, though he was rightly surprised when the whole story – Raven and Hank, and his indecision about staying with Erik – came tumbling out after their second cup of tea.

Charles sighed. “I don’t know what to do. My heart is torn over the two people I love most in the world. It seems no matter what happens I’m doomed to cause one of them pain.”

His hands were shaking, though he did not realize it until Steve reached over and gently grasped them within his own. “I have heard you speak much of Raven, and Erik, and even Henry’s happiness today. But I’ve heard no mention of your own, Charles. What would make _you_ happy and set your heart at ease? The happiness of others should not rest upon your shoulders alone.”

Perhaps the lack of sleep made him bold, for Charles snorted rather inelegantly at Steve’s encouraging words.

“I _am_ happy, and deliriously in love, though nothing of my relationship with Erik has ever set my heart at ease.” It felt a little like betrayal, to admit his misgivings out loud, and yet he could not stop the deluge of hurtful truths now if he tried. “I wish we’d met when he was yet unwed, and I did not have to hide my feelings for a married man. I wish to be his _spouse_ , in a marriage of equals, instead of the one who merely warms his bed. I want to claim any children I bear as my own, and for us to be a true family. And I want my sister to have all the things I want for myself!” He chuckled mirthlessly, and scrubbed his face with both hands. “I want it all, and I cannot have it, so I must make the best of what’s been given to me.”

His eyes stung as he struggled to maintain some semblance of control, for he could not bear the thought of the Captain pitying him, or worse. He was grateful for the silence when Steve simply sat and held his hand, and did not try to offer useless platitudes or empty promises that things would miraculously be alright.

Instead, he offered a revelation of his own. “I cannot say that I comprehend the extent of your anguish, Charles, but I too know what it is to love one who could never be mine. It was years ago, and yet it grieves me still…perhaps it always will.”

The news shocked him, for Charles had never heard mention of the Captain in any relationship, and none that made him look as he did now, a small, wistful smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He was instantly annoyed for being so self-centered; for taking solace in Steve’s friendship and providing little comfort and succour of his own.

“I’m so sorry, my friend, to know that you’ve suffered so. You must think me naïve and foolish, going on and on as though I’m the only person in the world to have—”

Steve interrupted with a smile and a light squeeze of his hand. “I think you’re a good person, with a kind and open heart, or you would not be so concerned for the wellbeing of others.”

It was difficult not to bask just a little under the warm appraisal, for Charles had dreamt of such a moment often when he was a child in awe of Steve’s mere presence. He grinned. “You flatter me with your kind words, though you’ve always been a gentleman and the worthiest of friends. I confess that I may have fancied marrying _you_ someday, all those years ago, as ridiculous as that must seem.”

The Captain did not respond, and Charles immediately cursed himself for his blunder; for making Steve uncomfortable with what he thought was a funny anecdote about his childish fantasies. “I didn’t mean anything by it, what I said. I beg your pardon if I’ve offended.”

“You did not,” Steve replied, and when Charles refused to look at him, still embarrassed by his admission, he stood from his seat and got down on one knee. “For I too have thought of you the same way. I did not think it appropriate to share such a sentiment with you, given your feelings for the Earl, but know that I esteem you greatly, and would be honored to marry you.”

Charles gasped. “You cannot mean it! You! You’re Captain Steven Rogers! There are a dozen omegas more suited to be your spouse! With better lineage and wealth and untouched by scandal—”

To his surprise, Steve laughed, and pressed a chaste kiss to his hand. “Charles, this may come as a surprise to you, but I too would prefer to marry someone for reasons other than lineage and wealth and whatever else the nobles think should be of great importance to me.”

“And what of love,” Charles countered, for he still could not believe in the sincerity of Steve’s claim, especially in light of his pregnant condition. “Do you not want someone who will love you with their whole heart? That cannot, and will never be me.”

To that Steve only smiled again, which, coupled with the way his eyes crinkled made Charles more than a little flustered. “My heart could not be yours either, not entirely, for I too carry a love for one who is married to another. But we are friends now, good ones, with mutual regard and understanding. Who is to say that it cannot grow into love, eventually? I can think of no other person with whom I’d like to try.”

“You mean this? Truly?”

“I do.”

Charles took a deep breath, and shook his head. “I cannot give you an answer now, or anytime soon. The baby is coming in just a few weeks, and Raven…I don’t know…”

“You need not give me an answer now, or ever,” Steve answered, as he slowly got to his feet. “If you wish we will never speak of it again, and our friendship will not suffer for it, I swear. In the end, you must make your own choice, and your own happiness.”

“Yes,” Charles agreed, “it is a decision I must make and soon.”


	5. Losses and Gains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Lehnsherr heir arrives. And Erik must live with Charles' difficult decision...

Erik remembered the first time he saw Charles Xavier, arm in arm with the eldest MacTaggert as she escorted him off the crowded dance floor. Eyes sparkling and cheeks flushed from exertion, he was positively awash with happiness and good cheer; a beacon of light that radiated across the room to capture Erik’s immediate and rapt attention. It had been impossible to ignore the pull of Charles’ smile, or the unexpected allure of his laugh, and Erik – in just a few short hours on a fateful spring evening - found himself falling completely and helplessly in love.  
  
It was a far different picture Charles painted now, hair matted with sweat and body wracked with pain, from a delivery that was taking them from early evening into the late hours of the following morning. Erik paced nervously through the width and breadth of Charlton Park, after McCoy arrived and banned him from the birthing room, his nerves frayed and temper short as he waited anxiously for news. Even Emma’s steady presence did little to ease his worry, though it warmed him to see the rest of the household nearly as eager as the Lehnsherrs for the safe arrival of their master’s heir.  
  
The clouds did not dissipate until close to the lunch hour, when McCoy finally exited the room with a tired, if triumphant smile. He clasped Erik’s shoulder and shook his hand, the young doctor’s relief and genuine happiness evident to all. Erik could scarcely refrain from running into the room, his racing heart calming as he gazed upon his lover holding their newborn babe in his arms.  
  
“Erik,” Charles greeted softly, and his smile was broad though his eyes were red rimmed and wet. He looked wan and exhausted; Erik did not think he had ever been more beautiful. “Come, darling, and meet your daughter.”  
  
He hovered for a moment, in awe and a little unsure, until his feet carried him unthinkingly across the room to settle beside Charles on the bed. The babe was swaddled in a soft blanket of white, impossibly tiny, and a swell of such fierce and abiding love swept through him as he gazed upon her scrunched up face.  
  
“A daughter,” he breathed, reaching with the tip of his finger to brush against her downy cheek. Tears welled in his eyes as Charles slid her carefully into his arms, and he let out a long, shuddering sigh. “ _Our_ daughter, my brave, wonderful Charles. I can scarce believe that she’s really here after everything…it’s like a dream come true.”  
  
“A dream indeed,” Charles agreed, as a lone tear slid unbidden down his cheek. “You cannot know the joy it gives me to see you together…the two people I love most in all the world.”  
  
“I know it, for that is how I feel about you too,” Erik replied, and he kissed Charles gently, with reverence and great care. “I have been blessed from the moment I met you. You have given me everything I’ve ever wanted…things I never dared to hope for in all my life.”  
  
The smile fell abruptly then off Charles’ face, and he closed his eyes as he squeezed tightly at Erik’s hand. He looked pained, and trying stoically to hide it and Erik cursed himself for neglecting to ask after his lover’s well-being, so enthralled as they were over their new baby.  
  
“Are you in great pain?” he asked, as Charles groaned and leaned back against the pillows. “Shall I call McCoy in to check on you? I’m so sorry…I should have asked right away I didn’t mean to—”  
  
Charles laughed softly, and shook his head. “It’s alright. Henry already gave me some herbs to take. There’s nothing more to do now, he said, but try to get some rest.”  
  
“Is there truly nothing else? Shall I have the cook make you something to eat? Let me speak to McCoy and—”  
  
“Erik,” Charles interrupted, as he brushed the light dusting of hair that covered the baby’s head. “We should give her a name.”  
  
They had spent months going through dozens of names for both boys and girls, settling on one for each and then changing their minds again until they finally narrowed the list down to a few suitable choices. He thought he knew what it should be, now that Erik could actually hold her and see her face, but still--  
  
“Tell me. I want you to decide our daughter’s name.”  
  
Charles smiled then, and pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, breathing her in. “Edie,” he whispered, “she looks like an Edie to me.”    
  
His mother would be so pleased, Erik thought, not just to have a grandchild as namesake, but to know that he’d finally found the happiness that had eluded him for years. While Erik had despaired after Magda’s untimely death, Edie herself had never given up hope that he would find another omega to cherish and to love.

Erik grinned, and gently squeezed the babe’s tiny hand. “She does indeed.”

“You should take her to Emma now, and the others, so they can meet her,” Charles said, and of course he would be concerned for those waiting anxiously outside the door, while Erik was still too overwhelmed to think of anything beyond his newly formed family. “And then Ms. Salvadore will need to properly dress and feed her. I’m sure Henry will want another look at her too before he goes.”

He was right of course, but Erik was loath to leave him on his own, after Charles had suffered so many hours of painful labor without his lover at his side. But the thought of being parted from his daughter was equally distressing, for he did not think he could bear – at least for the foreseeable moment – to let Edie out of his sight.

“Go,” Charles urged, aptly reading the conflict that must be writ all over his face, “I’m going to try to get some sleep. Doctor’s orders.”

“Alright, but I’ll be back to check on you soon,” he acquiesced, and let Charles press another kiss to the top of the babe’s head before he got up from the bed. “I’ll bring you something to eat too…I’m sure the cook is already working on a feast of your favorites.”

Charles sighed and rubbed his temple. “I’m very grateful to Mrs. Fergus but the thought of food right now is… Perhaps you can let her know not to rush anything? Or to go to any unnecessary trouble please?”

“Mrs. Fergus adores you and it’s no trouble at all. But yes, I’ll relay the message, and bring you something later when you’re up for it.”

“Thank you.”

He hugged Edie close and crossed the room, glancing back once more when he reached the threshold. “Sleep well. I’ll be there when you wake up.”

Charles cleared his throat and offered Erik a watery smile. “l’ll be right here.”

Something struck him as slightly off about Charles’ expression as he watched Erik carry Edie away, but he had no more than a moment to think on it before Emma was upon them, cooing softly over the tiny creature in his arms.

“Oh Erik,” she breathed, her entire face transformed with quiet wonder, “she’s perfect.”

“She is,” he agreed readily, and they both chuckled at Erik’s enthusiastic response. “Darling Emma, meet Edie Lehnsherr, future Mistress of Charlton Park.”

Emma smiled at him and winked, and brushed a manicured finger across the baby’s cheek. “It’s an honor to meet you, Lady Edie. Welcome to your new home.”

They giggled and cooed over the babe until Ms. Salvadore came for her, promising to return Edie as soon as she had been fed, bathed and then dressed in her new clothes. It was difficult, not to immediately follow when the nurse took the babe and disappeared from their sight, but Emma managed to distract him with tea and a light meal from the kitchen – the first food or drink he’d taken since dinner the evening before.

The thrill of his daughter’s arrival sank deep into Erik’s bones, tempering a disposition that had always tended towards pragmatic and even a touch pessimistic. But it was not just Erik who was affected by the new life in their midst, for Emma and even the servants seemed to be caught up in her spell. Joy, simple and full of hope carried him through the first hours and then days after her birth, infusing Erik with unadulterated happiness and the household with new energy, blinding them all to the subtle signs that all was not quite right with his convalescing lover.

It began simply, with a perfectly reasonable request, for Erik to return to his own room at night instead of joining Charles in his bed. He agreed immediately and without hesitation, for McCoy himself had prescribed sufficient bed rest as the best route to Charles’ speedy recovery. It would also allow Charles to sleep undisturbed, Erik reasoned, while Ms. Salvadore – and Erik and even Emma, unorthodox though that had seemed to their nurse – to wake throughout the night to help tend to the baby’s needs.

Then it became routine for meals to be delivered to Charles in his room, after the first day when Erik himself had brought his dinner. With Charles still in pain it was difficult to get dressed without help, and the energy required to get ready for a meal in the dining room seemed better spent on relaxing and being pampered without concern over appearances. Erik found too that he had little reason to worry with the return of Charles’ appetite, as every meal that Mrs. Fergus lovingly prepared for him was consumed wholeheartedly and without complaint.  

And finally, when Charles was able to leave the room again for some much needed exercise, Sean was ready and waiting, and eager to help him resume his daily walks through the grounds. They spent a few hours outdoors each day in the June sunshine, and Erik was glad to see a healthy glow replace the tired pallor of Charles’ countenance. If ever Erik thought it strange that his lover did not often request his company on these walks—

Well his attention was quickly and easily diverted by Edie, or business that he had all but let fall to the wayside in the final hectic weeks of Charles’ pregnancy.

As ever, it was an astute Emma who saw it first, and mentioned it to Erik one night as they rocked Edie to sleep in the nursery.

“Have you seen Charles today?” she asked, as she reached into the cradle and brushed the baby’s tiny hand. “I had hoped to see him return to taking meals with us in the dining room. It’s been days since I saw him last.”

“Of course, I saw him this morning at breakfast,” Erik said, “we even managed to play half a game of chess before I was called away. He seems to be recuperating quite well, from what Dr. McCoy said. I’m sure he’ll be up to taking dinner with us again soon. I’ll ask him.”

“Hmm,” was Emma’s reply, which told Erik that her question hadn’t been answered to satisfaction. “You haven’t noticed anything strange about Charles? Since the baby was born?”

“Strange?” he echoed, tempted to immediately dismiss the comment out of hand. But then he thought about the admittedly little time that he’d spent with Charles in the past weeks since Edie’s arrival, and noted that perhaps his lover _had_ been a little distant. Charles had asked for time alone to recuperate and Erik had willingly given it, thinking only to please him, and to support his recovery.

It did not occur to him until this very moment that there might be more to his request.

Even so, he replied, “Perhaps he just needs time to feel himself again. After all it’s been nine months of carrying a child inside his body, and then a rather strenuous delivery. I’m sure things will go back to normal when he’s ready. You’ll see.”

“Erik, he’s barely interacting with the household, except for Sean, and takes his meals in his room even after Dr. McCoy had deemed him ready for being outdoors. And…he’s barely spent any time alone with Edie, for all that he loves her with all his heart.”

“He sees her when she’s with Ms. Salvadore! He told me just this morning how he thinks Edie has my eyes—”

“Erik, listen to me,” Emma said, as she reached to clutch his hand. “We’re losing him. Day by day and minute by minute. You must speak to him and convince him to stay, or I fear it will be too little too late.”  

The words stayed with him long into the night, and Erik found himself unable to sleep, his mind dissecting every moment he’d spent with Charles since the baby’s birth. Stubbornly, _desperately_ he clung to Charles’ fervent promises, that he was going to stay forever, and they would fill the manor’s halls with many more children to love. But the tiny seed of fear bloomed ever larger as the hours wore on, until he could hold back no longer, and made his way as quickly and quietly as he could to Charles’ bedroom. He slid under the covers and wrapped his arms around his lover, and held his breath when Charles stirred slightly and murmured, “Erik?”

“Shh, I’m sorry to wake you. Go back to sleep.”

He didn’t know what to expect, for Emma’s forewarnings still weighed heavy in his heart, but Charles only sighed and settled against him, and nuzzled his head against his chest. “Mm. Missed you.”

Throat tight, Erik stifled the urge to cry out in relief, knowing that Charles wanted him still, and longed too for his presence. He pressed a gentle kiss to Charles’ head then, and let the tension seep from his shoulders with a slow, calming breath.

“I’ve missed you too. I love you.”

Charles did not answer, his breathing steady as he slept on, unaware of the uncertainty that had plagued Erik through the night. Erik himself lay in the dark for some indeterminate time, letting Charles’ presence comfort and sooth him, until he drifted finally into a dreamless and much needed sleep.

* * *

Sunlight streamed through the drawn curtains when Erik opened his eyes, making him groan and roll onto his side. It became apparent immediately that he was alone in the bed, the spot beside him vacant and cool to the touch. He kicked the covers back with a sigh and tried to squelch his disappointment, for Erik had planned to steal a few quiet moments alone with Charles before beginning their day. It felt like an eternity had passed since they last shared a bed, and he was eager to return to their established routine.

It was Sean and not Charles who met him in the hall, after Erik had returned to his own room and changed into a fresh set of clothes. The boy had developed a great attachment to Charles, since his assignment as the man’s valet, and was likely waiting now with a message from his wayward lover.

“Good morning, Sir.”

“Good morning,” he replied, “and how are you today?”

“Very well, Sir.” Sean smiled, and followed him as he made his way further down the corridor. “My Lady and Ms. Salvadore are with Miss Edie in the parlour. And Mr. Xavier asked me to tell you that Mrs. Fergus made your favorites for a late breakfast.”

Erik grinned, for he knew that Charles must have been the one to ask her on his behalf. “Thank you. Where is Mr. Xavier at the moment?”

The smile on Sean’s face dimmed just a little, before he schooled his expression and led Erik into the dining room. “On a stroll in the garden with Captain Rogers, Sir. The Captain arrived an hour ago to call on Mr. Xavier.”

His back stiffened involuntarily, and he willed himself not to react outwardly to the news. Erik cleared his throat and answered, “How good of the Captain to visit. I’m sure he’ll be pleased to see how well Charles is recovering.”

Sean nodded, but he didn’t meet Erik’s eyes. “Of course, Sir. Will there be anything else?”

“Thank you, no.”

“I’ll have Mary send up breakfast,” he said, and promptly left Erik on his own.

Sean was barely out the door when Erik’s feet took him in the opposite direction, towards the library which had large windows that overlooked the gardens behind Charlton Park. He was not proud of it, and knew that Charles had never given Erik cause to mistrust him, but he could do nothing to quash the burgeoning dread in his gut. And what he saw only added to his growing paranoia, for Charles was indeed standing quite close to the Captain - the two half-hidden by the rose bushes - and holding his hand.

Erik turned and stormed away, eager to put some distance between himself and the embodiment of his worse fears come to life. No, he did not think that Charles had been untrue or unfaithful, for he was too good – and the Captain too virtuous – for such a betrayal. Yet he could not deny how it pained him to see their close friendship, and how well matched they seemed, and how much better Charles’ circumstances would be if he chose Steven Rogers as his mate. There was nothing in the world Erik wouldn’t give to his beloved, except the one thing Charles had ever wanted or needed – a true marriage of equals.

He was alone, nursing a glass of brandy when Charles found him in the study, seated in front of the chess set they’d abandoned so many nights ago for languid kisses by the fire. Charles reached for the bottle and poured a glass for himself, before taking the seat across Erik with a sigh.

They sat in silence for long moments, and Erik watched as Charles took a fortifying sip, grimacing from the burn. He looked uncomfortable, glancing nervously around the room, his lips pursed in a frown as he rolled the crystal back and forth between his palms.

“You have something to tell me.”

It pained him, knowing what news he might hear, but Erik had no desire to draw out the inevitable. Some part of him had always known that this day would come, when Charles would finally realize that he deserved better than Erik Lehnsherr.

“Yes,” Charles replied, his voice catching as he stared at Erik, his eyes already glistening with unshed tears. “I must break my promise to you, after all. I cannot stay here at Charlton Park.”

Erik could not meet his eyes, for fear that he might fling himself upon Charles’ feet and start to cry. Instead he asked, “Will you tell me why, Charles? What has happened to change your mind? Is it—” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “I have always said that the choice is yours to stay or go, only…please tell me you still love me? And Edie? I could bear anything but that; to know that your feelings for us have changed.”

It was Charles who sprang to his feet and knelt in front of Erik, and clutched their hands together with a startled gasp. “Oh no, no! Of course I love you still! And Edie with all my heart! I could never stop loving you, Erik. Oh, my love.”

And then it all came spilling out, McCoy’s courtship with his sister Raven, and the proposal she refused, so as not to tie the doctor’s reputation to the Xavier name. The conflict was plain on Charles’ face, as he relayed her plan to sacrifice happiness with McCoy for love of her brother. And of Charles’ conscience and his moral dilemma, and how his own joy would forever be marred by Raven’s loss.

In the end it made perfect sense to Erik, why Charles would choose to leave. He was too kind and loyal to hold his own happiness above others, especially over a sister he cherished and adored. But it was no less excruciating to bear, and Erik could not begin to conceive of it - the life he would now have to lead without Charles at his side.

“I’m sorry, my love. I’m so, so sorry,” Charles whispered, and Erik could do nothing but cling to him, as hot tears rained unashamedly down his face. He fought the urge to plead for Charles to change his mind, knowing it would only add to the crushing guilt he undoubtedly carried. And so they held each other tightly, and wept in each other’s arms, as Erik’s aching heart shattered and his hopes turned to dust.

When their tears were spent and their bodies ached from the strain, Erik pulled back and brushed the dampness tenderly from his lover’s cheek. “How long do we have? I mean until…”

He could scarcely say the words out loud, and Charles in turn could not look him in the eye when he replied, “Tomorrow. Raven is coming for me after breakfast.”

“No!” Erik could not believe it, that Charles would give them – give _him_ – so little notice of his departure. “It’s too soon! I’ve only just realized…you can’t leave us _tomorrow_! You have not told Emma, or Sean, or any of the others! And Edie! You can’t possibly—"

“Erik—”

“No, please it’s only been a month since the delivery! You’re meant to be recuperating still! I can’t believe McCoy would allow you to travel—”

“ _Erik_ ,” Charles pleaded, flinging his arms around Erik again and holding him close. “Please my love, listen to me. The longer I stay the harder it will be, for you _and_ for me! If I stay another week, another month it will only prolong the torture, for every moment will be filled with the dread of my leaving. The beautiful memories we’ve built will fade into nothing, all but consumed by the inevitable pain to come.”

Bitterly Erik replied, “You would deny me the chance to say a proper goodbye? To spend time with you and Edie together? To hold you in my arms and make love to you one last time?”

“Don’t you see?” Charles entreated, his voice trembling with emotion. “I would stay, and deny nothing that you asked of me, and every second that I remain my resolve will weaken—”

“And you’ll stay! Stay with us as you promised!”

“And I would stay yes, and be happy, yet filled with guilt and self-loathing for the end of my days.”

It was impossible to argue, even as his heart railed against the unfairness of Charles’ logic. He  pulled Charles onto his lap as he slumped onto the ground with a defeated sigh. “What will I tell Edie? When she’s old enough to ask about you? How do I make her understand how much she means to us both when you are not here?”

It was Charles’ who chuckled bitterly now, though he pressed himself tighter against Erik’s chest. “You don’t have to tell her anything about me at all. She won’t miss what she doesn’t remember—”

“Charles, no! Of course I will tell her everything, for she must know how very much we love each other, and how that love brought her into our lives.”

“Then tell her—” Charles stumbled over his words a little as he heaved a great sigh, “tell her that I needed to do what was right, so she could be proud of me.” 

“Oh my love,” Erik said, and his heart broke again for Charles, who would not only lose Erik, but Edie too from his life. It was a stark reminder of the sacrifices that his lover had already made – had been making since he first arrived at Charlton Park – for love of a man he could not claim. “You are the best person I’ve ever known. I would never let our daughter forget you.”

He wished there was more he could offer, to the man who had given Erik everything he’d ever desired – friendship, love, and a child of their blood. And yet what Charles truly needed now was his understanding and support, and for Erik to stop making the situation worse by refusing to let him go.

“It’s enough to know you won’t forget me,” Charles replied, and then he visibly steeled himself and slowly got to his feet. “Come, let us not spend these last hours here, on the floor of the study. I should like to speak to Emma and the staff and make my farewells.”

“And Edie?”

Charles smiled ruefully, and squeezed Erik’s hand. “Perhaps we could spend the evening together, just the three of us? I know it will be difficult, so if you’d prefer not to I would understand.”

There was nothing Erik could do but to pull Charles close, surging to his feet and into breathless kiss that made Charles sag against him with a groan. He yearned to drag his lover to bed and caress him from head to toe; to strip Charles and bare him for Erik’s eyes and lips to devour. Instead he only cupped Charles’ cheeks with gentle hands, and pressed their foreheads together with a defeated sigh. “I would take every moment – _any_ moment - with you, any way that I can.”

“Oh Erik. I’m so sorry.”

Shaking his head, he gently but firmly nudged Charles towards the door. “Go. Take whatever time you need. Edie and I will be waiting.”

Charles inhaled roughly, expression inscrutable, staring at Erik for long moments before he turned and quickly exited the room. And though he longed to follow, to spend every last second they had left together, Erik forced himself to stay put. He needed a bit of time to steel himself for Edie’s sake and his own, willing his hands not to shake as he poured another glass of brandy. But it did nothing to settle the maelstrom in his stomach or his heart, and Erik was tempted to drain the remainder of the bottle; to lose himself in a drunken haze to try and dull the pain. In the end he thought better of it, and went instead to the nursery to wait with Edie for Charles’ return.

The evening was as painful as anything Erik had ever experienced; as full of helplessness as when he had sat as a young man at his dying mother’s bedside, and as much pain and regret standing over Magda’s freshly hewn grave. His conversation with Charles was stilted as it had never been since the beginning of their acquaintance, with Edie the only subject that no longer seemed forced or irrelevant. They took dinner together, eating quietly as their daughter slept, and did not give voice to the hurts that now filled the yawning chasm between them.

A somber Emma came to the nursery when the hour grew late, and took their place beside the baby’s crib. She made no comment around the redness of Charles’ eyes or the devastation upon Erik’s face, close as she was to losing her own tightly held composure. Charles kissed her cheek and then bent over to kiss Edie, his expression colored with pain and longing as he stroked her tiny fingers. He was memorizing her, Erik knew, every crook and curve of her face to the sweet scent that lingered on her skin, a treasure to be buried alongside their ill-fated love affair.

“Stay with me?” Erik asked, once the nursery door was shut behind them, with Charles looking so lost and broken that he felt it like physical pain. “Tonight. Be with me, so I can touch you, and kiss you, and hold you in my arms. I want…Please, let me take care of you.”  

Charles pursed his lips unhappily and shook his head. “I’m not fully recovered yet. It’s still too soon after the delivery for—”

“No Charles,” he said, pulling his lover into a tight embrace, “that’s not what I’m asking. I just…I’ve missed you so much, sleeping beside you and being able to hold you in my arms. I just want to spend this last night together, while we still can. While you’re still mine.”

“It might make things harder, in the morning.”

Erik scoffed, unable to hide the bitterness that was threatening to overwhelm him. “Nothing will change that now, Charles, no matter what happens tonight. My broken heart will not be any less broken, and you will still have to leave me.”

He stood and waited, silent as Charles clenched and unclenched his fists, his face haloed by the warmth of the candlelight in the hallway, timeless and beautiful and infinitely sad. Would Charles ever truly smile again, he wondered? Or had Erik broken his spirit irrevocably, their love to be a remembrance of hurt and regret?

“I’m sorry, I can’t,” Charles breathed, and promptly fled from Erik’s side, disappearing towards his own room without a backwards glance. Surprise slowly morphed to resignation as Erik stared after him, his feet seemingly rooted to the floor. He wanted so much to beg Charles for just a little more time, and share their last hours together instead of apart. Instead he made his way slowly to his own room, where he shed his waist coat and shoes and sank dejectedly onto the bed.

He would leave Charles alone, as he should have from the very beginning, that first night they met at the MacTaggerts’ ball.

There was no way to know how long he sat there in the dark, unable to sleep or even to close his eyes without seeing Charles’ expressive face. It was a prelude to the long and lonely nights that awaited him, though no different from the ones that he’d lived contentedly before Charles’ arrival. And yet the man’s mere existence – his _everything_ – had changed Erik forever, and he did not think he’d ever be happy again without Charles at his side.

The door to his room creaked open some indeterminate amount of time later, the glow of a candle casting dancing shadows on the wall and across the bedspread. Erik’s breath caught as Charles came into view, dressed in his nightshirt and wrapped in his familiar blue dressing gown. They stared at each other, and Erik did not speak, too afraid that any word might send Charles running out the door. But he could not help but cry out when Charles set the candle down and then lunged for him, tumbling them both onto Erik’s bed.

They made love in silence, unwilling to break the spell, letting their hands and lips convey what mere words could not. Erik touched and kissed as Charles arched beneath him, etching every inch of his lover’s body forever into memory.  And though they could not be joined again so soon after Edie’s birth, Erik took great care to please his lover, determined to make Charles fall apart with Erik’s name upon his lips. It was akin to heaven, watching the pleasure roll through and over Charles in cresting waves; Erik had no choice but to follow, letting Charles drag him over the edge too with complete and utter abandon.

“I cannot regret this,” Erik said, as they lay entwined on the bed, bodies sated and hearts sore, sweat cooling on their heated skin. “I cannot regret meeting you, or loving you, or every single moment we’ve ever had together, no matter how much this hurts. I was meant to love you, Charles Xavier and no other, now until the day I die.”

“No regrets,” Charles agreed, and the grip he had on Erik’s hand stiffened until it was just shy of painful. His voice sounded hollow, and Erik clutched him all the tighter. “I was meant to love you too, my darling, just…not to keep you.”

Erik said nothing, for nothing could be said in reply.

* * *

The morning dawned both wet and grey, a light summer rain falling gently upon the carriage as it pulled before the Manor door. Charles had already spoken with most of the household and said his goodbyes, though a few still came out to see him off – Azazel, who had grown fond of Charles and shared with him a love of literature; Mrs. Fergus, who saw in Charles a son to dote upon, in place of her own; and Ms. Salvadore who carried a sleeping Edie in her arms, swaddled in white.

Emma stood at Erik’s side, an iron grip on his arm to help anchor and support him. They stood and watched as Sean loaded Charles’ things onto the carriage, before taking his place beside the driver for the trip to Xavier Manor. At Erik’s request – and Sean’s enthusiastic agreement – he had been tasked to accompany Charles home, to continue serving as his valet. It was the only concession his lover was willing to make, refusing all else that Erik tried to give him, leaving with not much more than what he’d brought with him all those months ago to Charlton Park.       

“I thank you for your generosity and your hospitality,” Charles said, his voice steady and turmoil indiscernible, revealing none of the anguish that bubbled beneath the surface, “I wish you and your new family great happiness, my Lord and Lady Lehnsherr. Edie…your daughter…she is truly blessed.”

The words were like a knife to his heart, and try as he might Erik could not formulate the expected reply. He could only stare dully as rivulets of water beaded on Charles’ skin and slid down his face, his clothes dampening as they stood – face to face and already miles apart – in the rain.

It was Emma who moved first, pressing a kiss to Charles’ cheek and squeezing his hand with great feeling. “We owe you a debt that can never be repaid. Be well, Charles, and know that our gratitude and friendship go with you, from now to the end of days.”

Charles smiled. “Goodbye, Emma. Thank you. For everything.”

She turned then and led the others back inside, leaving Erik alone with Charles on the front step. Raven, who had been watching from inside the carriage, moved away from the window to give them some privacy, though of course they were still in full view of Sean and the driver. It hardly mattered, for Erik did not _want_ to say goodbye, and had not the wherewithal to muster simple platitudes when his whole world was being torn asunder.

As always, it was Charles – his brave, brilliant Charles – who found the courage Erik lacked, and pulled him into a tight embrace.

“Goodbye, my love,” Charles whispered, carefully extricating himself from Erik who was reluctant to let go. “Take care of yourself, and Edie. You’ll be in my heart and my mind, always.”

And then Charles was turning and making his way to the carriage, where Raven greeted him with a blanket to dry off and keep warm. He spared only a quick glance at Erik before disappearing inside the cabin, and moments later, left Charlton Park and all of its inhabitants behind.

“Goodbye, Charles,” he said, ignoring his tears that mingled freely now with the warm summer rain. “Goodbye.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Cover Art for- The Master of Charlton Park](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14199543) by [JackyJango](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackyJango/pseuds/JackyJango)




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